


Waiting For The Miracle

by Intense_Madness



Category: Leonard Cohen (Artist), Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Constructive Criticism Welcome, F/M, My First Fanfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:55:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 24,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25782484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Intense_Madness/pseuds/Intense_Madness
Summary: Miracle definitely signed up for this, but doesn't know how or when. Diavolo is definitely impressed, but Lucifer is ABSOLUTELY not. She has no special powers that she is aware of, aside from evoking strong opinions in powerful men, and being on the side of snake eyes rolled against the side of seven ;) She is brazen and honest, and faces all obstacles head on.I am giving her soul a whole new back story that I might be going back to foreshadow. So umm... wish me luck, i guess.
Relationships: Diavolo/Main Character (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!), Main Character/Mammon (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)
Comments: 12
Kudos: 16





	1. The Maestro Says It's Mozart

“She will be so perfect!” Lord Diavolo’s golden eyes seem to glisten as he proclaims for the fifteenth time as he sets up the summoning ritual. He stops again to inspect himself in the mirror. He ensures his auburn hair looks well kept. He double checks to ensure his golden ropes and tassel drape correctly and are not tangled up with each other. He shines the buttons on his red trench coat for the fifth time in the last thirty minutes, and he readjusts his white tie, and lines up the buckle of his coat with the seam. He looks at Lucifer, and asks for the third time (Lucifer is keeping count.) “How do I look? Am I giving off the right first impression?” 

Lucifer sighs. “You look breathtaking, Lord Diavolo, as always. I am sure she will be quite impressed with you.” Lucifer gets a rather put upon look on his face when Diavolo walks around and readjusts how the paludamentum drapes off his coat for the second time. “Diavolo, thank you. I am sure I will be fine though.”

He then looks over Asmodeus, Satan, and Beelzebub. He gives Satan’s bow-tie a small adjustment, and then sighs and shakes his head at the other two.

Satan smiles. Lucifer looks at him cautioning, a look that Satan disregards. “I’m sure it will be fine. I am sure she will be utterly impressed.” He speaks like one comforting a worried toddler. Diavolo either misses the tone, or chooses to ignore it. No one is really sure with him.

Beelzebub’s stomach makes a noise a bit like a bullfrog calling for a mate. He grabs it, as if that will silence it. Embarrassment spreads across his face like a condiment. "Can we summon her soon? I am starting to get hungry."

Diavolo ignores him. “She is deeply philosophical, and poetic… So much wisdom, and seeking of wisdom!… I hope she will enjoy talking to me! AND she’s in the Reserve Officer’s Training Corps for her country! Countries do..." his expression carries the weight of consideration as he stares off for a moment, "...sometimes do atrocious things, but you can’t question the loyalty and principle of someone that volunteers to serve and protect their countrymen! She must know a martial art or two! I hope will spar with me! I will go gentle, of course. I mean, she is human...” His smile is beaming.

Lucifer smiles when his friend looks at him. "It sounds like you are planning out your whole year around her! What if she is terrified and cries and wants to go home the second she looks at us? We are demons. This is Hell. She has no magic to speak of, no desire for power, and it is as though you entirely missed the deeply religious undertones in her writing. Her words reminded me of a Templar." Lucifer shudders (along with everyone else). "You remember them, don't you?"

Lucifer had not been nearly as impressed by this application. Where Diavolo was seeing the deep musings of a ‘warrior poet’, Lucifer was seeing the pretentious word-vomit paired with an inexplicable rage. Lucifer was hoping to get one of the witches that summons Mammon and shakes him down for money. Any of these witches would clearly be insufferable, but any human would be. These witches would at least be easy to manipulate. They would probably make for an easy year for him. He had no idea what to expect from this girl, Miracle, aside from the way her name made him twitch already. 

Furthermore, as a bonus, Diavolo has been acting like a bride the morning of her wedding for the past three hours. He wanted to summon her last, which is fine, but he would not stop talking about her… even to the other exchange students. Two of them were angels, so they should be fine. Luke was barely registering anything but the annoyance of being here. Simeon seemed intrigued by Diavolo's excitement. Solomon’s reaction to the discussion of this ‘warrior poet’ was… indecipherable, but uncomfortable. He was definitely the kind of guy that never felt like a second fiddle, until Diavolo started discussing this unmagical girl of no note as though she were someone he should be honored to meet.

Diavolo did one more white glove inspection. He nodded, satisfied and began the incantation to summon Miracle. Saying her name caused most of the demons to wince.

~~~~

We finished our Saturday military science class at noon. College promises to be rough, and we will probably need each other to get through it. We didn’t plan this ice breaker to last this long. For some of the more responsible ones, it did not. I didn’t fall into that group though. This too is part of military training, I convince myself as I lick the salt from the crook of my thumb, shoot that burning liquid and bite down on my fifth lime. I had convinced myself of this for the past three weeks. It's my first taste of freedom from the girl I'd known I need to be for so long. I am called up again to sing karaoke. How many times did I sign up? I don’t even remember. I get up on the stage with some help from my friends, after a couple of trips on my very tall, black platform boots. The downbeat strikes, and I am in the zone. I am moving my hips in my tight jeans DUN-DUN “Hey yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah” DUN-DUN “Hey yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah…” 

Something doesn't feel right. I felt a welling of anxiety, and I don't have stage fright. A threat, a sense of danger, my heart is racing. I lick my lips and grab the microphone tighter. The world fades from me. Was I roofied? FUCK! I kept an eye on my drinks. Did I? I watched my six. I am sure I now have to depend on my battle buddies, but we are not the responsible ones...We are all drunk. I am certainly some kind of incapacitated right now. I panic, but I can’t do anything effective against this. A blinding white light surrounds me. It is more than blinding. It is too loud, too hot, too cold, (like that one time when I was 5 and I put icy hot on my sunburn), it fills my nostrils with an overbearing smell of smoke and offal. There is a thick sensation in my mouth, it feels like blood, but tastes like “Demon Ichor” (a spicy sauce of concentrated ghost peppers I tasted once on a dare.) Through all of this, my head starts to ache in front, between my eyes. My World Religions teacher said that they call that the 'Third Eye' in India. My doctor called it 'the spot my migraines begin from.' This is the last straw. All I can do is cry. I feel weak, weaker than I have ever felt. My mortal coil can only take so much. I am fairly sure this is not roofies though. I whisper a silent prayer thanking God for that small kindness.

Through all of this, a voice pierces into my consciousness. “Help me. Please help me. I am being locked up by a demon and you are my only hope. I am depending on you. You must find me.” I don't know what is going on, I don't know who this is, but I know that this person is real, whoever they might be. They are probably fucked if they need me anytime soon. The fact that I have someone to save helps me find something within myself. I close my eyes and though I have no sense of gravity, I cross my legs and steeple my hands. I feel myself, my own touch. I still exist. I think. For the sake of this new battle buddy, I must continue.

I can only muster enough strength to whisper back. “I don't know who you are. I don't know why I am your only hope. I fear there isn't much I can do. I will do my best.” I hope that gives him hope.

“I will do my best.” I feel myself mutter those words as I awaken. My body feels like it has been through, precisely what I just felt. I am sitting cross-legged on the floor of what looks like an old British courtroom. Five very tall men are standing around me, staring. A man with golden eyes and auburn hair looks upon me. His smile is warm and assuring, but I can’t shake that anxious feeling.

I barely register that he speaks. I am sure it's a threat or accusation. I size up the room and finding viable escape routes and the best improvised weapons, in case I need them. I don’t like my odds, but the wise words of Mad Dog Mattis echoed in my brain. …Have a plan to kill everyone you meet…

Not that any plan I could come up with made me comfortable enough to try it. I am sure that I am about to put my combat training to some use right now. I go to take off my shoes, my stiletto platforms simultaneously are my biggest weakness if on my feet and my closest possible weapon if I can fumble them off into my hands. My jeans are not what I would prefer to enter a battle with, but they are far better than what looks sort of like 17th century military uniforms, at least on the fellows wearing them properly. Granted the one who looks most jacked up also looks most jacked. I can’t let him hit me. He would definitely take me out in one swing. He looks very mean too. Fuck, I'm boned. I managed to get one shoe off, and I nimbly hopped up on that foot. Surprisingly nimble for the amount of tequila I’ve been shooting. Adrenaline can do that, apparently. I don’t know. Fuck science, I guess I am fighting crane-style with a heavy sprinkling of drunken. I pop up and put myself in a stance on my socked foot, pointing my platform boot stiletto out, like it's a knife. I try to keep all of them in my view. I am going to find the trapped mother fucker and get him out of here. “I am agile!” I sputter. My eyes are feral with panic.

The blonde in the green shirt with the bow tie puts a hand on his chest and smirks at me. I don’t know what the fuck that means, but fuck him in particular. I point my heal at him while I make sure to keep one eye on the big fellow. He looks like someone I can make easier work of.

The man with golden eyes wearing red looks at me smiling. He waves at me to get my attention. I notice some deep sadness in his eyes. “While agility is a good trait to possess, you do not need it right now, I assure you.” His voice is also warm and kind. “I am Lord Diavolo, Lord of All Demons.”

I look at him and then at the others around me. My brow furrows as I consider the implications associated with his title. “I... what?” I don't let my guard down, but I do attend to him while I keep scanning the crowd.

He smiles back. “Congratulations, human, you have been selected for a year’s study at the Royal Academy of Diavolo! Welcome to The Devildom!”

My eyes are not sure if they want to go wide with confusion or the panic of understanding. “I just want to make sure I am tracking all of the essential elements of information I have gathered. You are Diavolo, Lord of All Demons. I am being welcomed to a place called 'The Devildom.' You just called me human… so... I am still human.” I snap my fingers. “Oh! I have also been selected to study here! This is a...college?” I lower my hand holding the boot and foot. I look at the blonde in the bow-tie. "I am truly sorry... for..." I look down at my shoe in my hand and up at him. "Ya know..."

He looks at my hand and at my face with a smirk as he raises his right hand to his chest. "Don't even worry about it. I think this maybe my favorite thing that happened today. My name is Satan, Avatar of Wrath, by the way."

I tilt my head while looking at him. I have many questions, none of them polite. If I am here for a year, I might be able to find out the answers. "My name is Miracle, but most people call me Mira." Satan nods at me with a smile. This conversation is so otherwise mundane it takes me a second to process that his name is 'Satan.' By the time I fully comprehend, he seems so nice, I forget to worry.

I look back to Diavolo. "I'm sorry for...all of that." I am making a great first impression.

He smiles at me. “No harm done.” His voice has an earnest and sincere quality I wouldn’t expect from a Lord of All Demons. He moves his hand to indicate I should look out one of the windows. “This is the ‘Royal Academy of Diavolo,’ but we call it RAD. You are currently in the assembly hall, where we assembly leaders hold our meetings and conduct our business. I am president of said council.”

I He looks at me expectantly. Is the Lord of All Demons trying to impress me with his student counsel presidency? I'll be impressed, I guess. "That is so awesome! I bet it's a lot of work. I would like to ask though, why am I here?”

Another fellow with dark hair and deep burgundy eyes clears his throat to get my attention. “I will explain everything for you.” He looks like the type of guy that would use ‘elucidate’ without blinking an eye. If that was a way someone could look.

Diavolo chimes in. “Miracle, this is Lucifer.” He claps his hand on Lucifer's shoulder. “He is a very powerful and quite handsome demon. He is also The Avatar of Pride, and vice president of the student council. He is also my most trusted friend.”

Lucifer looks horribly uncomfortable as he responds. “Flattery will get you nowhere, Diavolo.”—His discomfort is making me uncomfortable. I do remember this name from The Bible, but He doesn’t look anywhere near what I would imagine. His presence feels right though.

He looks at me with a smile, our eyes meet as he greets me. I feel the significance of the fact I am talking to a powerful being that has inspired fear of toeing the line lest you meet his fate. The stories of his betrayal, the consequences, his beauty, it’s corruption, the tragedy therin, and terrifying nature. I see all of it, all at once. I assure you he is everything you’d expect him to be. Though if you are into certain gothic aesthetics, you might protest his beauty was not corrupted, but I digress. The brightness, the sorrow, the sadism, the lordliness, and…a hint of something you would not comprehend if you didn’t see him. His presence inspires more fear in me than Diavolo's. I am not fully sure why. There is so much to take in, it takes me a lot of willpower to not get lost in thought when he speaks. However; it's rude not to give your full attention to someone when they talk to you. “Speaking on behalf of the entire student body, and this storied school of ours…” I try to hide my smirk as he pauses at 'storied' for emphasis. I don’t think it is possible, but trying is polite… I think. He seems to have a smirk that matches mine. Are we having a moment? “I offer you a most heartfelt welcome...Mira.” I'm glad I gave them that, it's only polite.

“Thank you, sir. I am intrigued by storied places." I emphasize the same word to check. He smirks back. This moment won't last though. "I am still curious as to how I was chosen. I am wondering if you have the right person…” 

He looks at me. “I don’t think we could summon the wrong person. Your name isn't exactly common! We know what we are doing!” I guess he took that as an insult. Just as quickly as it looked like we were bonding, he hates me.

“I just… I don’t remember signing up for any sort of study abroad, let alone an inter-dimensional one!”

His face takes on a look of concern, but his voice seems too excited. “If you are very certain you didn't sign up, we can send you back! I can prepare the...”

Diavolo cuts Lucifer off. “Miracle, I am not sure how you could meet the parameters of filling out an application without remembering…” I could feel the clash of wills between the two of them. They were both trying to guide me to different conclusions about this situation. Diavolo seeks my gaze. Anytime I look at him, he seems to light up. “… however, we would be honored if you would accept the opportunity to learn from this academy. The writing sample you sent out to us shows a lot of eloquence and thoughtfulness.”

I catch Lucifer looking very put upon. He doesn't want Lord Diavolo's flattery, but he doesn't seem to want me to have it either. I'd spend a whole year studying this dynamic, and I could write a whole psychological journal on it.

Lucifer’s red eyes seem to be watching my every thought as though he is waiting patiently for my mind to stop trailing off so I will properly attend to him. “Ah yes, Lord Diavolo believes that you would be a strong candidate for this program, but far be it from us to pressure you to stay. If you feel as though this isn’t right for you, I don’t see a proper moral basis to keep you in this dangerous place. It is difficult to be a human here. While we will do everything we can to ensure you won’t get hurt, but it isn’t like we can unequivocally guarantee your safety. It is understandable to be scared. You have no magic. We do have other candidates that do. ”

I move a tendril of hair from my face and lick my lips as I take in Lucifer’s words and I fully come to the realization of why he said them. People are always telling me things are too dangerous. I'm sick of it. I was sick of it one major life decision ago, and joined the military. I stuck it to my family, I can stick it to this powerful stranger. I notice Satan perks up a bit when I am gathering myself. I turn to Diavolo and give him a pained look, I dislike this thing in my nature. "I wish I could say I am staying..." I give a significant look to Lucifer. “…entirely because you believe in me, but..." I pause for emphasis and dramatic flair. "I am also staying because I have been talked out of too many opportunities because of concern for my safety.” I survey the room. "I won't need too much protection, I don't think. I make wise decisions and I am pretty strong." I sniffle a little as I stretch myself into a flexing position. I have some muscle tone, it is clear that I have some sort of workout regimen, but this display is for joking purposes.

The tall, muscular red-headed man gives me an earnest look. "You feminine type humans don't seem to understand that if you want muscles, you have to eat something every now and then. Maybe we should take her to the house and have dinner. Maybe I can give her some more tips. I can help her be strong."

Even if I was joking, that still stung a little. Satan must have seen that because he speaks out. "Oh, don't mind him. This is Beelzebub, Avatar of Gluttony. His stomach was growling before you got here. He's looking for any excuse to get back to the kitchen."

Beel looks at me blushing. "Hi."

I was going to say something back, but the final gentleman in the room walks up to me and puts his hand out as though he wants to shake hands, but he takes my hand and puts it to his mouth. It seemed like a sweet gesture, until he tongued, sucked on, and gently nibbled my knuckle. I raise an eyebrow at him. He smiles back, making eye contact with me and winking. I think I imagined something flashing in his rosy colored irises. He's pretty, but... utterly inappropriate. "My name is Asmodeus, Avatar of Lust." He tries to hold my eye contact, but i turn away because he is super creepy.

"I am pleased to make all of your acquaintances..." I don't know what my face it's doing. Is it a cringe, grimace, or am I smiling. I really can't tell anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a couple of edits, as I figured out what is going on with Miracle. As a possible deviation, she may or may not be connected to Lilith. Do stay tuned as more comes to me.
> 
> Song: Waiting For The Miracle


	2. I Was Cautioned To Surrender

Lucifer looks utterly defeated and a touch incensed as he thrusts, by what all appearances is a smartphone in front of me. “I am going to put my second brother, Mammon, Avatar of Greed, in charge of protecting you. He is…” Lucifer sighs. That is unsettling. However, I learned not to put much value in the opinions of those that don't value me. So, maybe Mammon is fucking fantastic. I am going to assume he is until he proves otherwise.

Lucifer makes me call Mammon, I guess to prove I know how a fucking smartphone works. I am greeted with a "Yoooo!"

I don't know who this Mammon is, but his voice reminds me of a buddy back home! He puts me at ease. "Whatup?"

"Not much, are you prankin' me? You ain't Lucifer."

I kind of giggle at that. "Not sure why you would think I am him. I'm calling from my own borrowed phone or D.D.D., as I have learned you call it here. I'm one of the exchange students. I guess you are gonna be my Guardian Demon?"

He laughs. "Pssh, naw, dude, The Great Mammon ain't doin' that."

"Alright, no worries, I didn't want a Guardian Demon anyway. I'll just tell Lucifer..."

Lucifer scowls at me, and motions for me to hand him the phone. I scowl back. He rips the phone from my hand and the air around him is ten degrees colder than it should be. "Mammon, you are to come over here and get this human, otherwise, so help me..."

He hangs up and hands the phone back to me. "I don't think you fully understand the nature of this. You don't tell me anything. Mammon WILL be protecting you while you are here. There aren't many demons he can't protect you from, but I am his elder brother, so I would stop getting on my bad side if I were you!"

I shake my head, using every last bit of my bravado to look unphased. It took much of my discipline to not try and punch Lucifer in the face. He exudes presence and power. I am shaking; however, it isn't from fear. I catch Satan out of the corner of my eye. He is watching me with eyebrows arched. I guess he likes the show.

I smile sweetly, and work to keep my voice measured. I've met a few assholes. They all want you to stroke their pride. Being as this is the Avatar of Pride, it only follows that he is the Exemplar of Assholes. "Lucifer, sir..." he seems the type to like that, "I don't need a guardian. This isn't the only realm where I am looked at like I'm a piece of meat. Just give me a machete and a can of holy water or mace or whatever all the demon ladies carry to ensure they safely get from their class to their dorm room. I'll be fine."

Lucifer's eyes purple as they meet mine. I did everything I could to be reasonable. I am just about done if this paternalistic... I can't even complete my thought before Diavolo clears his throat. "Lucifer, we just convinced this girl that she could stop aiming her stiletto heal at us. Perhaps, you can calm down when talking to someone who... hasn't had a few millennia to figure out how you operate. Who hasn't actually been disrespectful to you if you bothered to learn her culture." He is smiling, but there is something dangerous behind it that doesn't come out often. He turns to me. "Do you trust me, Miracle?"

I look at him and purse my lips. "I've never met you... but I have already decided to stay on your word." I sigh.

He nods, considering my response. "Well," he claps a hand extremely firmly on Lucifer's shoulder, "I trust him FULLY with my vision to bridge an understanding between our realm and yours. Perhaps he can start by bridging an understanding between HIMSELF and YOU. I want you to know, that you WILL have... a Guardian Demon." He smiles as he says that. "You will not be made to feel like you have to wander these halls armed armed to the teeth like... a blasted Templar," they all shudder as he says that, "to feel safe."

Before I have a moment to ask about 'Templars', a flurry of platinum hair, tan skin, and unkempt uniform slams the door open. He speaks with a loud booming voice. "Alright, where is the human?"

No, I'm not dealing with this. I look him in the eye. "My name is Miracle, not 'The Human'."

"You are whatever I call you, now give me all your money and worldly possessions. You WILL NOT call me again!" He gets really close, attempting to look intimidating.

After having Lucifer scowl at me, I am not sure who else can intimidate me. Also, this guy is nearly amusing in general. I smirk. "Alright, buddy, what do ya want? Money, I don't got that. The fucking shirt off my back?" I move like I am going to take it off and I pause. "I don't got anything for ya, so now what are ya gonna do?" I stare him down.

Mammon blushes. "Crazy human..." he trails off while mumbling something all I can distinguish is "Asmo."

Lucifer walks up and hits Mammon in the head with all the rage he was clearly feeling for both of us.

"Hey, quit it!" Mammon whines.

I don't know why Lucifer hitting his brother whom I have to performing psyops on to get him to stop demanding money... and to maybe call him by my name was the final straw. Maybe it was the look in Mammon's eyes, which kind of reminded me of a friend I had crash on my couch when she was getting away from her now ex-husband with her purpled eye-socket. Maybe because I always would defend the little guy... even if they could both kick my ass. It's part of who I am.

Regardless, my sense of justice fueled this rage. There is no reasoning. I turn and look Lucifer in the eye. All pretenses were done. This storm was coming. "Dude, what the fuck?"

Lucifer's form started to shift in front of me. "I am NOT your DUDE!" His voice commands its true power. Four black wings sprout behind him, two horns curled out and pointed upwards. His uniform changed into suit with whole black peacock motif. The crowning glory was there was some stupid jewel in the center of his forehead.

The whole thing is wasted upon me at this point. I would be scared. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I know I should be scared. I think this was about the fourth time I have come to terms with the fact I am about to die in the last hour. My adrenaline is tapped out. I have no delusion of adequacy, but he is coming for me, so fuck him. Fuck me too, because I know I am fucked. I know my life is forfeit... for some guy who just referred to me as 'the human.' I am going to get one good hit on him before he kills me. My entire life's legacy is about to be a scar from a stiletto boot on his inner thigh, or wherever I can get it. He comes at me, murder in his eyes. I hop out of the way somehow and move to kick him, but he is lightening fast, blocking me. I know how to move so he doesn't make my form crumple with death quite yet. In that swoop, he lowers his head to stare me down. I lowered my shod foot and close in. We are close, so close. He is not ready to block this... He can't anticipate my inginuity or idiocy. I headbutt him, right in his stupid jewel. What human would do that? We should know better.

As I fall to the ground, I see stars. It isn't like the cartoons. It's like... galaxies. I don't know. The concrete didn't feel hard or cold...


	3. I Would Like to Try Your Charity...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am definitely deviating from the timeline with Mammon. I feel like if you are going to get into a fight with someone way above your power level over their treatment of someone else way above your power level... the least that person would do is think you are endearing?! Perhaps he would tip his hand a little earlier?!

Is this what death feels like? That must be what this is. I feel like my spirit is soaring through spacetime gaining great knowledge. The stars sparkle more vibrantly than I have ever comprehended. I know that my vision was limited by my perspective, and I know what that means. I feel myself floating in a sea of salt knowledge. I stop at a font of fresh understanding to wash my face, but the water finds it's way in where my skull is weakened. This water is icy, I feel it freeze me. This sense of cold emanates from my third eye... or the spot where my migraines begin. Ice shards penetrate and seem to freeze deeper and grow within me. I wince and cry at the cold and pain. Something warm and gentle brushes across my cheek soothing me. I sigh and smile. I hear an ethereal voice giggle when I smile. I simply feel safe and cared for, and while the cold has not dissipated and it only worsens, it is... somehow more tolerable. Spacetime or death or whatever this is, is not bleak as advertised. The void is soft, and I feel some source of warmth affectionately stroking at my hair and face, then take my hand. I have imagined feeling something like this. I feel and hear myself sigh softly. I hear a voice sweetly giggle back. The voice sounds familiar, but not in this form.

Suddenly, emerald green eyes appear in my view with a Cheshire Cat smile and eyebrows expressing intrigue. This gaze brings back the memory, sort of. I am in a gown, cut to fit me perfectly, red with peacock feathers. I am looking at a beautiful man. He has porcelain skin, deep burgundy eyes, raven hair, and a hateful smile. Lucifer beacons me to him. There is no escaping this room. He puts his right arm up, bent at the elbow. I put my left hand on my hip and smile at the challenge. I am ready for the next fight, but we are dancing. He doesn't make it simple for me. He does all sorts of fancy steps, but I match him perfectly. He dips me, and I put my leg to hip. He taunts me. I push him away, and he looks indignant. I know what happens next when I anger such men. I ready my body for the onslaught. I scowl at him. Horns sprout from the top of his head, and a deep black jewel appears at the center of his forehead. I move to kick. I fight, but flow, until I see my opportunity. I am going to begin his most devastating migraine. My forehead slams into the jewel. I crack, but he crumples in front of me. I tower over him. His hateful smile is mine now. He turns away defeated. I look down with disgust, no desire to show him wrath or mercy. He is simply beneath my concern.

I feel my brow furrow and hear myself moan through it. "This is not me." I tense and tighten.

The warmth comes back brushing across my cheek and lips. It soothes me. I hear the voice again, less ethereal, more recognizable. It is unmistakable. Mammon's voice, but with the same warmth and affection which radiate through the touches. "What's my human dreamin' about, I wonder? I hope your dreams are nice. You deserve nice dreams." I feel his fingers lightly brush across my eyebrows before finding their way back into my hand. 'Your human?' Excuse me? The whole of this experience is really sweeter than I'd expect. Maybe, I will allow it.

My eyes flutter open. I attempt to take in my surroundings, but I am staring at the edges of an ice pack. How long has that been there? My head is on a pillow. Most of my body, is carefully wrapped in the softest comforter I ever felt. His thumb is brushing across the back of my hand, I look over at my Guardian Demon... whom I would apparently fight people and powerful demons over. I'd fight them harder now. He is beautiful, I mean his body is tan and well developed, and his hair looks like spun silk... but I have no idea how long he has been caring for me, and I steal a look at his eyes that are blue at the top, but fade into yellow at the bottom. He concentrates on my hand. "Ya dummy, I'M supposed ta protect YOU!" His other hand keeps the ice pack firmly anchored where I am injured, while he lectures my seemingly unconscious body. "He always hits me like that, why didja have ta go and care? Please wake up soon, okay?" His voice sounded like he was begging. "I'll even take ya shoppin' tomorrow... My treat!" He is now lying to wake me up. Avatar of Greed buying me things... lol.

I watch his face as I turn my hand to give his a squeeze. His eyes shine blue as he blushes. He looks over, and his eyes meet mine. He blushes and looks away again. "Don't look at me like that ya crazy human! I ain't here because I care or anythin', so get that out of your crazy cracked skull! Lucifer is makin' me do this." I raise an eyebrow at that. Can he not lie better than that? "He umm... had to make sure you didn't die because it would look bad..." He thinks for a while before saying this. "...and...umm no one else likes ya!" That would have maybe stung if I couldn't... actually feel him scrambling. "So umm... Lucifer made me do it!... Not that am doing it because I am scared of him... it's just... umm respect. I respect my brother so I am takin' care of ya, okay?"

I shake my head and smile. I look into his eyes. I speak neutrally as I take in the wholeness of this demon in front of me. "Don't worry, I understand." I don't think he realizes how much he has told me. I want to thank him for taking such good care of me, but I don't know how he will take that. I squeeze his hand again. I want a lighter and funnier conversation now. "How about that shopping trip tomorrow though? What time are you taking me?" I smile at him, and he looks away blushing, but it's like I poked a sore spot! I gasp. "I mean...could you show me around? I think if I am coming to a new world, with no luggage... a guide might help." I guess it's my turn to stammer. I have an excuse though: my mind is involuntarily analyzing every fact I have ever learned against the Ultimate Truth to see how it compares...while simultaneously judging these facts to see if they are useful or not. I cannot stop staring at Mammon. I see him fighting himself. It is a deep and ancient battle. No one has made any headway for a long time. Maybe today I did, for whatever that is worth. I don't know what is going on, but the more I stare, the more I just want to hug him. I know he is going to be a shithead, but I know who he is when I need him to be. Maybe someday, he will let me reciprocate.

He looks down and blushes. "Stop lookin' at me like that." He looks back at me, meeting my eyes. He smiles for a second. "I mean it, human, stop!" I turn away with some difficulty, he takes a piece of the blanket, and teasingly flips it over my head. My mind... starts to process all of the information I know about down comforters. This is a lot. I feel like Wikipedia, but someone keeps pressing 'random article'. His voice pulls me back to focus for a moment. "Anyway... how ya feelin'?" His fingers brush against my palm, and I am contemplating everything I know about physical contact and its affect on human physiology and wondering what it does to demon physiology...

It takes a lot of focus to answer his question. "I... umm... rather insignificant in the grand scheme of things, extraordinarily confused, and maybe like I could use a cup of water." I try to get up, but I feel some sort of vertigo, and my body falls back on the bed. I really feel as though I should be dead, but somehow I am not.

"Ya goofy human! Why are ya tryin' to get up? I ain't gonna charge ya that much for a glass of water!" I couldn't tell whether he was joking. He gets up taking his hand away, and the ice pack as well. I whimper at that without meaning to. He smiles back at me, and I blush this time. "I'll be right back, okay human?" He heads to the kitchen, which is apparently on the other side of my wall. I hear him fumble around in the cupboard and then turn on a faucet.

I start processing the memory of the conversation. "Mammon... shirt... off my back...it's all I got." I say out so he can hear me.

He comes back, puts the glass of water on my nightstand. "Let's go, talk to Lord Diavolo tomorrow about fundin' some clothes and other incidentals for ya. You are gonna need more to wear for the year than just that pair of pants." I look him in the eye and we both blush at that. He changes the topic quickly. "Anyway, do ya need help sitting to drink the water?" Before I can even nod, he wraps one arm around me, and gently moves me to a sitting position while his other hand presses the cup to my lips, and gently tips it so I can take small sips.

He brushes his fingers across my back. He's going to organize the funding of a whole wardrobe for me... but this was my favorite tank top.


	4. My Spirit Continues to Drool

I thought he would stay with me all night, just making me feel safe and comfortable. He probably thought the same thing too. He was making motions with his mouth as he gave me water, like you do with tiny babies when you are trying to teach them how to eat. I was watching him intently. If Mammon weren't here to care for me, I think I would have probably died of thirst during an internal war between the part of me that wants to figure out how to count and weigh the water molecules in the cup and the part of me that understands that this information won't help my physical body deal with the current problem. Whatever my mind is doing, it's becoming more assertive about doing it as I shed more of the fog of unconsciousness. I don't know if Mammon senses anything strange, but he is more--aggressively--keeping my attention on him and what he is doing. He's speaking to me as well, I don't focus too much on that. He reminds me frequently to not listen to what other demons have to say... they are all liars... but he is taking care of me now... I look deeply into Mammon's eyes. My mind fights for the words to ask this question. "Mammon, what is happening? Will I be like this forever?"

Mammon gave up on criticizing how I look at him. He blushes periodically, but he seems to revel in it, really. He smiles at me as I put my hand on his cheek, my eyes are pleading. He takes my hand, looking into my eyes with nothing but pure appreciation. He brushes his fingers across my cheek with the sweetest smile as he brushes the center of my forehead. He delicately inspects my injury, determining it is better, he softly kisses it. "I sure hope so!" I raise an eyebrow at that, but he hardly notices. He gently brings my head down to rest on his chest and plays with my hair.

I can't look up into his eyes from below. It's so hard to believe he is a demon, he's nearly glowing . "Mammon... you... are... beautiful." I hear his heart skip a beat and he makes a small moan. I know that there is something he is hiding, but this is the most cared for and at peace I have ever felt.

Before he can respond with anything other than physical reactions, my door slams open. " **MAMMON!** Pay back the money you owe me **NOW!** " A demon with violet hair nearly entirely covering his golden eyes steps slowly into the room with the intensity and emotion of a super hero landing. The whole thing might have looked far more intimidating if he weren't wearing old sweatpants and shirt that says Ruri-Chan with an anime girl making a peace sign and winking.

I don't know who this guy thinks he is, and what makes him think he can barge into my room without knocking and yell at my new boyfri... uh Guardian Demon. My neurons fire rapidly running through rules of etiquette in every culture I have interacted with or learned about. I really didn't need to do that. I fully confirm that this is disrespectful, and am INDIGNANT. I mean, I would find this annoying under normal circumstances, but I might be too scared to do anything, even with rude humans. Should I be scared of the fact I am more angry than scared? That is a thought for another day. I put my hand to my head, is there any way I can make my brain come to a consensus and let me act? I put my hand next to him so I can sit up, then grasp his shoulder to buttress myself. He is my rock, my support. Even though I only met him hours ago, I know I can depend on him. I know he cares about me. I look this newcomer in the eye. I am not feeling great, but I am a little stronger. I still hope to get this source of conflict peacefully out of my room. As much as I am fairly sure Mammon is lying, 'everyone else dislikes me' is a great excuse to stay in my room snuggling Mammon... until I absolutely must leave. I really would be fine not interacting with Lucifer until I had to. I smile sweetly. "Hi, excuse me, who are you, and what gives you the right to barge into my room?" I speak with the saccharine sweetness of a put upon customer service representative at the end of my shift.

Mammon puts his hand on my hand, but to remove it from him. He places it gently on the bed. He is careful to make sure I am stable as he pulls away from me. "Levi, I am gonna need some time. Lucifer is makin' me take care of this human girl, and she is so much work. You have no idea. Can you imagine it? **ME!** Babysitting a **HUMAN?** This is SO beneath me!..." He rolls his eyes like a petulant child. It is jarring, and painful. You know what? Fuck you buddy. This isn't the first time I have ever been hurt. I'm not going to cry. I don't do that. I bite my lip and turn away as a tear teases at the edge of my eye. It will not fall, I will not fail. Even if it does fall, it only happened because of the allergy I just discovered I have to this tree I just discovered was growing in my room. "...so I haven't had time to get your money. It's been 260 years, can ya leave it for another day?"

"Mammon, I need the money now! The manga set of ' _Journey to the Devildom: I Just Saved This Girl, And Got Cuddled More In One Night Than I Have In 3,000 Years, But I Now I'm Gonna Ruin It_ ' is being released! I need to get a first print! It comes with tickets to m-m-meet the artist, and g-get an autograph!" Anime is low and tasteless, but when it disappoints him, it must not feel like a personal slight.

"Levi, I don't know what any of that means, but I don't got money and I'm gonna need a little more time." Mammon shrugs his shoulders.

"Mammon you are a useless! Waste of space! Piece of scum! Pay me back and go crawl into a hole and die!" Levi screams.

I watch Mammon wince at that. Why the fuck do I even have any room to care right now? This pulls me to the brink where I turn away. I wipe the tear away. Either way, I guess I am healed... and that was nice while it lasted. I turn back to him, I want to let him know he is released, but he left in a split second while I was fixing my face to hide my emotions. A mixture of loneliness and disappointment wells inside me. I guess I'm pathetic now.

I sigh, as Levi approaches me. His eyes meet mine. The anger of them searing into me. "Did you know what he just did?" He doesn't wait for me to respond. "He left you here as a... distraction... a **SACRIFICE**!"

I look at Levi. "Okay, cool I don't know how long I was out, but I've resigned myself to death about five times now, highest ranking student counsel member guy hates me, and so if you are going to kill me for his sins or whatever, could you kindly get it over with?"

"HNGNFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!" Levi makes a noise like I broke him. "OMG OMG OMG! That was one of the stupidest Mangas I ever read!" His laughter mocking me. "The part where the heroine confronts the Highest Ranking Student Counsel Guy (who is actually second highest ranking, but if that was the only error it might be fine...) over his treatment of her assigned guardian... **THAT SHE JUST MET!!!** he is literally the scummiest character, and there is no logical reason he should have taken care of her!!! I was sure she was going to die at least 4 times, but then she didn't and..." I'm not really sure what I am being derided for right now, but the 'tune out' function in my brain is working again. "Anyway, human don't distract me with your trashy normie mangas! You are going to help me get my money from Mammon. Come with me!"

I start to protest that I am still having trouble standing up, but I'm not, to my own surprise. I am more recovered and this demon really won't let me get many words in edgewise, as much as he digs at and insults me, he just won't stop talking to me. He won't get to the fucking point and leave me the fuck alone. I notice that I am still processing excessive amounts of information on every item I see along the way, but it is less distracting, it's like breathing now, I guess. It's merely the act of over-analysis that I will be doing for a while...maybe the rest of my life. I hardly noticed we arrived to his room between actively tuning him out while he talks about what a STUPID NORMIE I am and what a GREAT OTAKU he is, and passively processing excessive information about carpets and windows. I look up and notice the weird jellyfish installation, and kind of look around a bit and realize I am in his room.

Once he has me in, he looks both ways and closes the door, he stares at me with low level panic in his eyes. Did he just realize he has a **girl** in his **room** and he doesn't know what to do. I smirk at him. "It's your move still buddy, I don't even know why the fuck you dragged me here." I notice some kind of cool looking old books. Juxtaposed with everything else in the room (and with the personality), they look out of place. He doesn't seem like a reader.

He catches me looking at them. "The Seven Lords! That's a good series, have you heard of it?"

"No, I haven't." I say neutrally.

Leviathan starts talking again. I bet if I could concentrate through his explanation and all of the tangents, I wouldn't need to read the damn novels. I am fairly sure I would rather read it than have some damn rambling fanboy describe it to me. I do note a couple of things I find interesting from his droning. Six of the Seven Lords have characteristics of the brothers that I have met for varying amounts of time. Leviathan seems to have extreme hatred for the fictional Second Lord aka Lord of Fools as much as his brother. "Yeah... fuck that guy." I murmur when he pauses. I think that made him smile. He relates highly to the Third Lord, The Lord of Shadow. I learned the Lord of Shadow has a friend named Henry. Henry is also the protagonist. Levi has a goldfish named Henry. He wants someone to high five in his life...WOW! I really don't know what to say to that. I figure it can't be me he wants to high five. I am normie trash after all.

My ears perk up when I think it is nearly done and I need to pretend I was highly interested and super jealous. "...but you're a human, so how come you haven't read this? You must be wasting your life? The author is a human named Christopher Peugeot."

I shake my head staunchly. "No, if there was a 138 volume fantasy series from Earth, I would know it. I love fantasy." I hold my hand to my heart. "Would you lend me the books so that I can read them?"

Leviathan scowls at me. "NO! Buy them yourself! I don't have a reason to trust you!"

Okay, that's fair. "Look. It's clear that you don't like me. I get it. I'm a normie, and you are some kind of attacku or whatever. That's cool. I can give you your space. You don't need to drag me in here to berate me. I'm not expecting to create long lasting friendships. Anyway, the long and the short of it is, can you state your business so I can fuck off?" Levi's seems shocked by my aggressive shift. Was he... hurt? It feels like this dude has been telling me he wants to be alone and I suck for a decade. He can't take me saying 'I too want to leave.'?

"It's **OTAKU**!!!!" He clenches and shakes his fists in front of me.

"The other fits better, I'm feeling just generally attacked." I start to open the door. "I already don't need this."

"No, wait, please! I asked for Solomon's help and he wouldn't help me! I need you!!! umm... What's your name again?" There is a whine in his voice.

He can't even just hate me with dignity. It rubs me wrong. "My name is Miracle." I stare him down, I'm not about to give him the easy for them to say version. He winces like I just attacked him. "What? Is there something wrong?"

"I umm... can I c-c-call you s-s-something else?"

"No." I say it firmly. "You don't actually need to call me anything at all. Just spit your plan out so I can reject it and leave. My time is far more valuable than this."

"So...umm... you won't do it either?" He looks at me with the saddest eyes.

Why does this soften me? I sigh. "Buddy, just give me your plan, and I'll decide. Alright?"

He looks at me a little timidly. "So...um... you're human."

"I get that a lot." I smirk.

"Humans can't normally control demons... especially without magic."

"Tracking... I guess."

"And... you need Mammon to... protect you anyway. Right?"

"Yes, I am human, I am frail, feeble, and I will probably die a horrifying death. Can we get past the propaganda points that made them make Mammon my protector in the first place?"

"Wait, are you the human I saw on Devilgram that headbutt Lucifer?"

"Are there humans headbutting him a lot?"

"No?!"

"What made you ask me that?" I raise an eyebrow.

"A bit of the argument was there too. The central theme being you need a protector..." Levi chuckled. "You should look at it." He pulls out his DDD and shows me the video. It was posted anonymously, but it showed me a little, and mostly showed Lucifer. He's touching his head jewel like some thing happened. "That was pretty cool." He kind of smirks at me. "So, humans can make pacts with demons. I am going to need you to make a pact with Mammon to get me my money back."

"As much as I sympathize with your plight, sir, I am not giving up my soul so you can get your manga signed." 

"Oh no, you only have to give a demon something they find valuable. His going rate is WAAAYYY cheaper than a soul. He is SCUM! You could probably sell him catfish repellent and get his soul!"

"Wow, Leviathan, you are quite the salesman. You are really making me want this pact!" I say full of sarcasm.

He smirks back at me. "I am glad, because you are helping me, no matter what!" I can't tell if he is being sarcastic or not. "...I mean, he maybe scum, but he is still the second eldest, and he can be really useful with simple tasks. He will also have to actually do his job. We all want him to do his job, don't we?"

I chuckle. "Do we? What if I crave the sweet release?"

Leviathan blushes and balls his hand into a fist and holds it over his mouth. "You... umm... shouldn't... talk... like... that."

I chuckle at Mammon. There was a lot more to Mammon than those words he said to Leviathan about me. He held that ice pack on my head for hours. I am fairly certain he caught me when I was falling, and then he carried me to my bed. No, I am not buying scum. Bad with money, and manipulative, but there's more to him. I can help Leviathan without fully buying the 'Mammon is scum' line, and forcing him to do what I say for the rest of my life, or whatever. "I'll get you your money back. I'm not sure if I am comfortable making any sort of pact, but I'll see what I can do."


	5. It Is Your Turn, Beloved

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dreams are weird. Time is weird in dreams. That is my explanation. I don't know, I figure it would be more vivid and his motives would be clearer in his own head when he set this stage. I hope you enjoy it.

Mammon very rarely goes into his true form. There he was though bare chested, white tattoos, leather straps running in a crisscross pattern, bat wings outstretched, cradling Miracle and scowling at Lucifer. Then as suddenly as one could see this scene, he flies up, and is out of the hall.

Lucifer didn't notice the scowl. He can't pierce through the fog around his own mind, as he teeters in and out of consciousness for a moment. Satan, Beelzebub, and Asmodeus say their proper goodbyes to Lord Diavolo with Satan mentioning something about leaving the stove on. No one who isn't of a strong opinion yet really wishes to be in the middle of this hate triangle. There were too many true forms were whipped out, and a true form in this context is similar to bringing a Molotov cocktail to a political debate.

Lucifer feels something radiating from the jewel. It was more like something was dislodged, or dislocated, or perhaps both?! It was a long time since he had a fight. It wasn't because he didn't express his bloodlust freely and wantonly, but no one challenged him. Often, when Mammon was the target, the other brothers joined him. It didn't matter what the reason was, or if there even was one.

Today however, this utterly un-infernal, un-magical human threw down a gauntlet. His very nature wouldn't let him leave it as he should. Who would have thought he would have felt challenged by a mouthy human? The very worst part of this was that he has disappointed Diavolo. It's not causing a negative emotion in other demons, there would be none of the physical torture. Diavolo hasn't expressed himself that way since The Invasion. He had been on a quest for self-improvement. Lucifer had been obliged to follow, and wasn't really doing well. Today however, his fighting will be seen as backsliding. Diavolo will look at Lucifer with saddened eyes. Of course, this doesn't work on all demons. Only those that are close to him earn the honor and privilege of being held to a standard which they can fail to meet. Lucifer sits, holding his forehead, readying himself for the further onslaught.

Diavolo speaks with the kindness he always does. "Lucifer, We have much to discuss, would you kindly walk with me?"

Lucifer refuses to meet eyes with his friend. He speaks with anguish in his voice. "Yes, Lord..."

Diavolo clears his throat, causing Lucifer to look up. "Formalities are not necessary, friend."

Lucifer sees the disappointment, but he will bear it to look in the eyes of his truest friend. "Yes, Diavolo."

The men walk out, and the night is foggy with a fall chill. The winds are murmuring of the first day of university. The men are stewing in their thoughts. Lucifer waits for Diavolo to speak, but eventually loses patience. "So I presume you will be preparing a room for her at the castle then?"

Diavolo laughs boisterously at the thought. "No, I think not! She should stay with you, as we have painstakingly discussed for hours yesterday!"

Lucifer heavily sighs, "but, she is so very **contentious**..."

Diavolo shakes his head at his friend, and puts a hand strongly on his shoulder. "Lucifer, I know you don't want to hear this, but nothing happened at that meeting that Barbatos doesn't pencil into the schedule, except someone stood up to you. We usually calculate in 15-30 minutes for you to threaten or hit Mammon specifically. I am shocked you didn't think a military sort would heavily question Mammon as a bodyguard. You saw how much effort I put into my dress and appearance right?"

Lucifer shakes his head. Perhaps he should have ensured Mammon understood the conversations they were having, instead of just nodding. But... does he really hit Mammon that much? "Mammon is the right demon for this..." Lucifer protests.

"Yes, we discussed that for hours yesterday too. You were right, I, myself personally guarding her," he winks as he puts his hand up like he is whispering, "and her staying as my guest in my castle, would ensure all of the demons bow and scrape before her to ingratiate themselves to me."

"But, I don't really feel like she should be my guest anymore. Couldn't she stay with the other exchange students?" Lucifer looks at Diavolo imploring.

The Lord looks upon his most trusted friend, and speaks with finality. "No. She will stay with you. I have my reasons. Her soul is not the only one that I am hoping to shine." Diavolo smiles. "I am also assigning you homework! You will apologize to Miracle--and Mammon." Diavolo doesn't often give commands. Usually, he gives suggestions, and he will be disappointed if you can't make them happen. As he gave this assignment, Diavolo stepped into the entry way of the castle.

Lucifer didn't realize how fast they were walking. Diavolo never gives clear signs his patience is wearing thin, but when he is enjoying time with Lucifer, he lengthens the time in any way possible.

"Your will be done, Diavolo." They say their good byes, and Lucifer is free to contort his face expressing the discomfort and general unhappiness at this order.

It's not like Lucifer doesn't acknowledge he has a lot to apologize for, but he doesn't know where to begin with Mammon. As he walks home, memories of Mammon come to him unbidden. He shined with so much love before The Fall, even after... for far longer than the rest of them did. He refused to believe this place was horrible. He refused to stop being an angel. He seemed to staunchly believe that with enough benevolence and sacrifice he could change hearts and minds. He would truly listen and hold Lucifer close while he wept for all those who followed him into rebellion. He would call these lesser demons friends, and they would take advantage of him. He was so gullible, and he refused to take on his new mantle. He refused to go into his true form and view his darkness. For a short time, Lucifer admired his younger brother, but at some point something switched. His rage would inflame every time Mammon would fall into a trap, or inspire someone to do better. He would make him see the hideousness of this place and fall in line. Physical pain was a good teacher for his brother, and release for his own inner turmoil. Mammon was crushed under the weight of The Devildom. It just took a little longer. Lucifer winced at a thought he refused to let come to the surface.

He closed his eyes hoping his regret would stop haunting him... but all he could hear is Mammon's voice, whispering comforting things just like he used to. This memory teasing at his emotions. Lucifer felt the safety, warmth, and well of adoration he used to feel. He felt a memory of the hugs Mammon would give. The way he makes you feel safe, and looks into your eyes... like you are just worthy of love. Lucifer shakes his head. The Devildom destroyed Mammon eventually, because it is a terrible place. Lucifer misses Mammon! Admitting that to himself hurt. He tries desperately to think of something else, but he can't make his mind stop feeling and hearing this memory. It isn't a memory, a simple phrase makes him realize the true nature of these thoughts. Mammon's unmistakable whisper "Don't worry, you are safe now. I'm your Guardian Demon..."

The desire to cry inflames his rage again. He is feeling through her--as she is getting something he lost. He couldn't bear to watch this. The reasons were myriad. He decides to stop at Hell's Kitchen for a small meal, and enough demonus to ensure Mira's thoughts can't pierce this fog for the night before he stumbles home. Lucifer would rather not risk interaction with any of his brothers right now. He just goes to his room to prepare for bed.

Many warn against demonus before bed, unless you are seeking answers to questions you are too frightened to ask yourself. Though men who think they have all of the answers tend not to pay warnings much heed. He leafs through his record collection for a waltz that can shield him from anything that might come through. He sets it in the record player and rests the needle on top. He then goes to lay down. This bed is big, because he is important, and lonely because he pushed everyone away. But no amount of despondence can fix that now. He thinks as his eyes close.

He has a dream. He knows it's his dream. As someone lucid dreaming, he holds all the power. He stands elegantly in his true form. His darkened dove wings outstretched. His cloak and hair are windswept. The blood red lining and red peacock embellishments of his cloak perfectly complimenting the red in his pupils. His horns shine like obsidian. He is a terrifying, but beautiful sight. Miracle is here, but as this is his dream, she is clearly his. She knows she is in the presence of someone far more powerful than she can even understand with her human brain. Furthermore, there is no one to save. He is big and bad, but it should be exciting.

She is wearing an iridescent pale golden gown and a matching cloak. Her cloak is of the same shade with green and blue peacock detailing. The lining is green, which brings out a striking green color in her eyes. The way she stares him down, she is beautiful and unrelenting. She is not going to give in to his power. He is confident he is ready for this. He has had thousands of years practicing. He offers his hand, she looks around seeing no escape. She give him a look of resignation as she takes it. That's disappointing, but maybe this is one of those dreams with some realism...

He starts simply enough, a few box steps. She looks directly into his eyes with passion, but the passion of a warrior staring at a foe with the conviction she is right. If this is to be a battle, so be it. He smirks as he twirls her, guiding her to press against him. She drags a toe as she pulls her knee up to rest against hip. She smirks back at him. He dips her in response. He brings his face inches from hers. Looking into her eyes, he hoped she would relent into desire, but no--Mira still stares at him like she is trying to find any weakness to exploit long enough to escape.

He stands her back up and pushes her away in frustration. He can't even lucid dream his way into winning her over. She dodges and weaves and headbutts him again--perfectly in time with this waltz. She crumples at his feet, just as she did in the Student Counsel Hall, but Lucifer, himself, catches her. Concern and sorrow in his eyes, but Diavolo nowhere in his thoughts. "Mira! Mira! Are you okay?"

He gets up with a jolt. "I don't check on my enemies..." He sits scowling at his sheets in his bed. He can't stop thinking about Mammon: the love in his eyes which is so deep and pure and honest, the way he can make you feel so safe, but in the end it's gone... and you just feel lonelier than you have ever felt in your life. Lucifer sighs... would alcohol work better? He opens his bottle of scotch and pours himself a double as he writes himself a sticky note to teach her how to hide her thoughts tomorrow. If this weren't so annoying, Lucifer would find humor in how quickly Mammon disappointed the warrior maiden.

Lucifer is assailed by confusion and anger mixed with the existential agony a human obviously has when a relationship ends after 3-5 hours. If he focuses, he can see... Levi. Lucifer chuckles at that. At least she's getting as tortured by her interactions as he has been. She seems to be pondering a lot of periphery and superficial things as he speaks to her. It is interesting to note that the words she focuses on when she focuses on Levi are: 'human', 'kill me now', 'pact', 'fuck off', and 'debt.' It took Lucifer a second to decipher what 'fuck off' meant, but it seems to be her preferred method of saying 'leave me alone' or 'I'll leave you alone.' It is interesting how language changes over even a century if you don't keep up. He feels every painstaking question she has. How she doesn't want to hurt Mammon... and the final plan... to find an item to offer him, and tell him to pay his brother back and 'fuck off.' Lucifer notes to himself before going back to sleep that he should: let Mira know where 'Goldie' is, and tell Mammon what that particular turn of phrase means. As much as she is a thorn in his side, perhaps helping Mira into a pact with Mammon will be good for him.

Lucifer catches himself feeling glad her head and mind seem to be better, not just because it is less chatty... Ugh. He will need to organize a shopping trip for her. He should send her with Asmodeus and subtly let Mammon know he failed her. It seems awful, but there IS always a method.


	6. I Said This Can't Be Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I edited some things here, as I came back here to check on it for notes on future conversation. It was kind of a mess.

I lay in the bed with my eyes closed. I don't remember going home, I don't remember going to sleep. I must have passed out drunk or...something... and my friends brought me to safety while I had weird fucking dreams about pretty demons and shit. I am going to open my eyes, and I am going to see MY ceiling in MY room in MY house. I am going to stop drinking. This was the absolute nadir of my descent. I am going to turn my life around.

I open my eyes. I look around. I am in a strange room, and there really is a tree next to my bed. I was really hoping this wasn't real, as this situation brings about more questions than I had the capacity to ponder in my current condition. I take a deep breath and a long exhale. What I am going to do? I guess I already know. I am going to take this year one day at a time, and accept this amazing opportunity to attend Demon Hogwarts or whatever. I sit up and stretch. My head fully indulges in it's well earned ache. I want to lay back down; unfortunately, I probably have things to do. It should be Saturday by my calculations. I don't think that dude who somehow needs me for his plot to obtain his anime wouldn't let me sleep through a whole day. I am still wearing the same clothes. I can tell without looking in the mirror that my face looks like a giant smudge. I am generally in need of a shower. Worst of all, the inside of my mouth still tastes like tequila.

I look around, and eventually notice a gift basket on a dresser. I walk up to and see some assorted necessities toothbrush, toothpaste, shower gel, shampoo, conditioner, and a loofah! I open the bottles, and inhale the scent. It is a lovely vanilla and sandalwood sort of smell. I notice they even provided me a bottle of 800mg Motrin and a bottle of water. I take three pills, think for a second and take a fourth for good measure. That's my dosage for existential agony. I chuckle to myself. I notice some clothing has been laid out for me: black combat boots with decorative spikes, distressed dark jeans, black loose tank top with open back. There is a note in front of the basket. I pick it up. It was heavily drenched in a lavender scented perfume, and written in beautiful calligraphy is a friendly message: 'Welcome, we are happy to have you here! We hope you enjoy your year with us💕'. I chuckle, that note was clearly meant for the new arrival, but they couldn't have been expecting someone like me. I look around and this room is lovely, and there were kind gestures done by people who were excited to meet me throughout. I can't stay here forever. I resign myself to that fact that I will have to face the other brothers and their edited opinions of who I am at some point. I take the basket to the bathroom and get ready for the day.

After I shower and dress, I look myself over in the full length mirror. I apply some of the lip gloss I had in my pockets when I was summoned, and use an elastic band to put my hair in a half up/half down ponytail. The Motrin is working wonders, I can concentrate on things aside from my pain. I walk out of my room, entirely unsure of what direction I should go. I decide... left. I strut with confidence, straight into Beelzebub.

"Hey! Watch where you are going!" He snarls at me.

I look up to meet his scowling eyes. I am not short, but he towers over me. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that."

He scowls at me and continues in a belligerent tone. "It's hard to tell, you run into people a lot."

It's hard not to laugh at that. This pointed assessment in so few words feels like perhaps the punchline. I don't feel like I should laugh, as this very powerful demon is clearly expressing his utter disgust with me. The chuckle escapes despite my best efforts. I look down. I have a feeling I am about to die, and my epitaph will read 'Roasted by The Avatar of Gluttony😂😂😂' or something like that. I won't have to worry about dying again... I think... I think they can only kill me once.

~~~~~~~~~

Lucifer sits in his study, his eyes have long glazed over at the banality of her thoughts. "Of course she would put emojis on her gravestone." He has nearly been brought to tears so many times. Though he has existed in Hell for a few millennia at this point, this connection to her mind is the worst torture he has ever felt. To add insult to injury, he keeps seeing flashes of Mammon's face. Mostly his eyes all through the night. Mira wouldn't stop picturing them somewhere in the back of her mind. She also replayed the fight with Lucifer. He can see his own face. He feels, not her fear of death, but understanding its inevitability. 'One good hit... to remember me by.' He chuckles. "Oh, Mira, I will never forget you." As for Mammon... she keeps feeling deep pain about him. No matter what he teaches her, this will be powerful and painful. 'This... place... broke... Mammon!' It's a mantra he is chanting in his mind as he looks into the mirror. He would talk to her now, but he wants to talk to them together. The less time he has to deal with his 'homework', the better. He takes a shot of demonus to make his mind less acutely aware of all of this.

~~~~~~~~~~

I zone out for a moment kind of stuck laughing madly, questioning my life (death?) choices. I think I hear Beelzebub, almost laugh at whatever is happening to me, but is trying his hardest to be curt and unfriendly. "Human, stop laughing! I didn't joke with you! I am sworn to defend my brother, and..." I stopped laughing at his first sentence, and look at him. I am about to apologize, but the look of conflict he gives before he trails off seems to require something else. Perhaps he realized Mammon is also his brother.

I look into his eyes. I'm not sure what to say. He looks utterly tragic. I was sure he was going to destroy me where I stand not 15 seconds ago, and now he looks sadder than I have ever seen. "Are you okay? Do you umm... need anything from me?"

I hear a loud and familiar growl as he grabs his stomach. His look is still distant, when he speaks. "I'm hungry, and..." he cuts himself off and takes a deep inhale "you probably need food too. You can come with me, you don't look like you eat even as much as Asmo. Let's go to the kitchen, but hurry!" He takes my hand.

The kitchen is about 5 steps from my door. It's on the other side of my wall. I remember that vaguely. Beelzebub tears into the cabinets grabbing any and all of the snack food and raw ingredients he can find. Dry beans, flour, stale corn chips... nothing is safe. There are a couple of labeled things he looks at, and puts back down. I look in the fridge. All of the food looks a little off, but I can find things that are nearly things I would cook with at home. I find eggs, but the shells are a bluish gray. I find an assortment of vegetables and what looks like left over chicken--it smells much more gamy though. I also find something called 'ghost cheddar.' It is orange with a red marbling. Is it haunted? Is it spicy? Is it both? I can't wait to find out. I maybe dying of cheese in a bit. At least nothing else can kill me.

I grab a small pan, and put some oil in. While the pan heats up, I rifle through the cupboards which spices seem right. The brothers have a lot of them, which is good. Are they haunted? I figure out some analog flavors to the ones I like. I start sizzling the meat, and wilting the vegetables, while I crack and beat two eggs. I get the meat and veggies cooked up and pour the eggs and spices over them. I watch it for a bit while the eggs start to solidify, but are still runny. I put the cheese in. It smells spicy, but really good.

My mind wanders as I ponder how excruciatingly pointless my thoughts are. I shake my head and shudder. I feel Beelzebub next to me trying to take my food from the pan with his bare hand. I guess it smells good to him. "Umm... excuse me... I was making that for me. I can make you one after I eat." I grab an apple covered in a purple substance from next to me, and force it into his hand as I speak. "Perhaps this can tide you over for a bit?"

The demon looks dejected, and then he gives me a scowl. He whines, "I don't like these that much." I raise an eyebrow. I guess not everything can be stale chips...and the bag they came in. "Okay, I will make you an omelet very soon. Can you find something else to tide you..." He inhales the apple as he stomps back to the cabinets. I guess it's settled then. I grab a **spatula** and put my food on a **plate** and sit at the counter. I eat it fairly quickly for someone who uses a fork. Incidentally, the cheese has a nice kick, and I don't think I am possessed.

When I finish eating, I get to work on a far bigger omelet. I grab the biggest pan. I use six eggs, the rest of the meat, more veggies, and shave off about half a block of the cheese. I try to keep the spices about the same for the ratio. The eggs bubble and sizzle, he tries again to make a grab for still cooking food. Without thinking, I catch his and and hold it away from the pan gently. I look in his eyes to make sure I didn't upset him. He blushes at me. I grasp gently with my thumb and curl my fingers around the back of his hand. He doesn't try to remove his hand. "Just a moment. It's almost done, would you like to grab a plate?" He reaches above me with his free hand. I fold the eggs in half, and let the cheese melt. I then lift it with the spatula onto the plate. "Bone apple tea."

He chuckles at me and picks up the omelet like it is a Hot Pocket. He eats it in two bites. I am sure this is the most joyful smile I have seen as he returns to his quest to clean out the kitchen. I step out of the kitchen to leave him to his business. As he hears me, he looks up with sincere gratitude in his eyes, "that was good. Thank you." He goes back to raiding the cabinets.

"You are welcome." I smile at him. He pulls out a bag of rice, takes the spices I used and dumps them all in the bag. He then pulls out a handful, and crunches it. He smiles at me with dried herbs and rice between his teeth. I almost want to cook him more food, but I don't think he has the patience to wait for another meal, let alone the amount of meals it would take to satiate him.

I see Mammon in the hallway. Dude, fuck that guy! I turn away before he tries to say anything to me, but Lucifer ambushes me--us, actually--from the other side. "I need to speak with you. Both of you. In my study. NOW!"

I look at Mammon. Mammon looks at me, and then down at the ground sadly. The hurt rolls over me, and the memories assail me. My chest is in knots of my sadness. This pain is way worse than it should be! I only knew him for less than a day, but he was so safe and warm and kind and I just want to cry. I won't give Mammon the satisfaction! I want to never see his stupid face again! I...

"Mira, **NOW!** Don't even think another thought!" Lucifer's voice has a tenseness to it. 'Dude, fuck you too.' I snarl inside my head as I follow Lucifer to his study. I take the opportunity to get my bearings taking a mental note of everything I see on the way. This is the first time I have seen most of this house. Mammon walks up to my right side and matches pace with me. I see him in my peripheries, but I make concerted effort to not even look at him.

He clears his throat and speaks timidly. "Hey Mira, you doin' better now?" Can he not catch a hint?

I want to cry and shriek 'fuck the fuck off,' but I turn to him and smile. "Yes, thank you for your care and concern. I am sorry for the trouble I caused you. I hope to not need to bother you again."

He looks down and mumbles something indistinct.

I turn back and see Lucifer has stopped in front of a door. He is scowling into my soul, no big deal. There is a dull ache as I meet his gaze. He touches his fingers to his forehead as well. "Mira, I have something I need to teach you." He indicates I should walk in the door as he goes in.

I walk in and close the door behind me. "Hello, Lucifer, sir. I think we got off on the wrong foot and I..."

He snaps, "Save your breath. I know you don't believe you need to apologize for anything. An apology is something you give when you feel that you have wronged someone. You do it in order to express that you feel bad about something. You don't do it to shut someone up, and you don't do it to receive an apology in return. When you have no contrition, your words are hollow." I feel his vitrol and disdain like it is my own.

I scowl back, quiet in the storm brewing beneath me.

He then smirks at me. "Honestly, after replaying the incident several times from your perspective, I have come to the conclusion that I may have over reacted."

I cock my head to him. "You've been replaying it from my perspective?"

He looks away, holding his head. "No, **YOU** have. I can just see it, feel it, and hear it..." he sighs "...which brings me to the topic at hand." He steeples his fingers and looks at me with malevolence.

I steeple my hands and stare back at him. This is what we are doing now, I guess.

"No, it's not." He involuntarily chuckles. Did he just answer my thought? "Yes, I did. Do you have any idea what it's like to experience the entirety of your unedited stream of consciousness?"

I chuckle back. "I umm... kind of just tune it out." Do I? Can I?

"ANYWAY... I would like to teach you how to hide your thoughts. Rather, not scream them at the top of your lungs into my mind. It is really simple. Close your eyes and imagine fog. Imagine it surrounding you. That is it. You can get the fuck out of my head." His eyes go wide, and he slaps his hand over his mouth when he says that. He touches his forehead and closes his eyes, blushing. "I really detest that word. It is approximately 20% of what you think." He smiles as I imagine the fog. "Anyway, I am glad you have had breakfast with Beelzebub. You have a full day, and I need to talk to Mammon. I have arranged for you to go on a shopping trip with Asmodeus. I know you were talking about going with Mammon, but his assets are _frozen_ until he pays his debts." Lucifer smirks at me. He sends out the strong impression he just said something significant to me. I don't quite know what it means.

I get up to leave, and Lucifer walks with me. I go to open the door, but he puts his hand against it, holding it shut. "Mira, one more thing." His eyes meet mine, and he looks at me more sincerely than he has looked to this point. He is very close to me. My heart beats faster, and I instinctively move my feet to ensure my stance is balanced. "I am truly sorry for how my actions made you feel..." he looks down at my feet, "at a visceral level." He sighs. "Please go find Asmodeus, I have to talk to Mammon now."

He moves to open the door for me, but I panic. I know he's been hearing my thoughts. As much as I am pissed at Mammon, I'm worried about it. I don't want him to hurt like his eyes suggested he does. "Lucifer, sir, I..."

His eyes look dangerous, like I shouldn't push my luck. "Mira, I have been his elder brother for several thousand years. Your life has been one grain of sand in the desert, in comparison to our relationship. You were absolutely nothing to him until last night. ."

Tears stream down my face, unbidden. Is Lucifer going to hurt him again? I tremble. I shouldn't care too much, as he doesn't care about me. A knot develops at the pit of my stomach at the idea he would be punished for me. The look in his eyes that inspired me to fight comes forward in my mind.

Lucifer scowls at me. "Mira, STOP!. I will let you deal with him for disappointing you. As far as I am concerned, he put a lot of energy and effort into ensuring your comfort as you recovered. I have other matters to discuss with him, and it isn't physical punishment. By the way, you would probably find your own inner monologue less annoying if you just admit you care. It really doesn't matter much to me, because I shouldn't be hearing it anymore. I could tell your dissonance annoys you as well though."

I'm not really sure what to say to that. I feel notes of concern, and it is rather sweet? So here I am talking to a demon, and he is... sweet? "Thank you, Lucifer." 

He opens the door for me with a warm smile. Mammon gives me a once over as I pass him. His eyes are full of concern that he would probably lie about if anyone called him out. I give him a reassuring smile.


	7. Tarnish the Golden Rule

Asmodeus waits for me in the entrance way of the house. He smiles at me. His eyes speak of annoyance and desire to lash out, and he can't keep it from his voice. "Hi Mira! I am so excited to hang out with you and get to know you!"

I have won a few of my forced interactions over by promising not to interact with them more than necessary. It is cold comfort for both of us though. We both know we have to accomplish this shopping trip, and together! I smile at him in return as I approach. "I am so excited to spend time with you and get to know you too!" I put a concerted effort in to sound excited, but I may have matched his tone.

He puts his hand out to show me something. "I have been trusted with holding this," I see a black card with Diavolo's name on it, "because--unlike Mammon--I'm not a scumbag, and I won't disappear and buy a bunch of things and leave you in a lurch." Why is he being so catty?

I can't even eek out a phony smile. Most of the conversation here seems to center around how awful Mammon is. It is exhausting. "Umm... that's great. Glad to have you on my side, buddy. Say, can we talk about something other than your opinion of Mammon? I have heard more than enough negative opinions regarding my appointed guardian. I do enjoy other topics."

He smiles at me, as his eyes meet mine. They sparkle for a second and I am drawn to him. His voice is smooth and seductive as he closes the space between us. "What would you like to talk about then?"

His eyes are an elegant rose garden maze, clearly designed for getting lost in. His hair looks so soft, I wonder if he would just let me run my fingers through it. I bite my lower lip at the thought. His scent is intoxicating. I can't think of a conversation I want to have but I want but I wonder if he would just let me... Ugh! NO! I am not like this. My breath hitches as I inhale. I smile easily. "Maybe, where you are taking me shopping?" I don't know how his closeness started my thoughts down this path, or what stopped me so suddenly. I am certain I need to watch myself though. I imagine armor under the fog around myself.

There is disappointment in his eyes, but his smile returns. "Well, we should hit up Majolish! You will need some cute new clothes. Something like that tank top! It's really cute. Where did you get it?"

"Oh, umm... I got it from a store called 'TJ Maxx' on Earth." My voice takes on the tone like I am coming clean about my poverty to the popular girl that I had been trying to impress.

He looks at me with disgust. He can't know my stores, but here he is, judging me. "Eh... I guess we should get going." He opens the door and he starts off. I follow him. I guess I have ruined whatever illusion of mystique I had with bargain shopping.

He takes me around a few small shops with some skincare, and recommends a 40 step regimen, but it seems rather time consuming. I asked about SPF and he chuckles. "Solomon asked that too, but we don't have sun. It seems like you'll miss it more than him. You should be more careful about that..." I shrug. We negotiate down to about a 5 step regimen with some self care items for days I have more time to dedicate to it. We buy me several new outfits, and he convinces me to get a few things that I wouldn't normally get. After some argument over the idea that reading gives you wrinkles, and a promise to get good sleep, he shows me where to buy books and school uniforms. My energy is waning, much of his conversation involves some kind of insult to me for just about anything and everything. Even a compliment is an insult somehow. Such as when he complimented my skin, he would point out that it had some small wrinkling that no one could do anything about. He shows me where the trendiest restaurants with the trendiest food are. I get some kind of smoothie with some kind of fruit that tastes a bit like strawberries.

We walk back down cobblestone streets. I look up at the trees with shimmery lights. The scene is reminiscent of walking through the streets of Europe, but the trees make it other worldly. The lights flicker and shimmer as a night sky filled with stars. I am most definitely lost in the woods, but I also can figure out how to survive. I look at my book titles: _The Art of the Hex, Demonic History, Simple Seduction._ I don't know how much of this I would use, but knowledge is the power to decide what I will use. I find a new energy in my anticipation for the first day of school. I hum with my excitement. Asmodeus looks over at me. I look at him. He probably thinks I am crazy. I don't really care. "This place is quite beautiful, really!"

He smiles at me, and locks eyes with me. "Not as beautiful as me." He looks down demurely, then back into my eyes. "You should really just concentrate on me, if you want to look at true beauty." He licks his lips.

I want to kiss him. My lips burn with desire, and it radiates from there. I could just let him ravage me in this alleyway we are coming up to... it's private enough. I close my eyes, imagining my legs wrapped around him, while his fingers swirl on my back, and my lips brush down his neck. I remember how it all feels, but I am sure this would be better! He looks at me with a devilish smile.

My hand trembles as it raises up to run through his hair. My forehead touches his. Everything for the past several hours has involved some sort of veiled hostility. This doesn't feel RIGHT! I bite my lower lip, and in a moment I am able to make this decision. I bite myself HARD. I focus on my pain. I struggle to stop pulling him closer. "Asmodeus, why are you doing this?" My hand moves gently to his chest, and I push myself away. His brows furrow in confusion, but his eyes communicate disappointment. I shake my head and scowl. I imagine light radiating off of me and burning through my connection. "Asmodeus, never attempt that again." I whisper through gritted teeth. I think about all of the events of this afternoon, unfortunately I don't think in chronological order. I remember the events in order of most infuriating to least. Then I close the connection.

I have never felt anything like that pull. It terrifies me. My body wanted...so much. I feel angry and violated. I feel vile and disgusting. We are not far from the house. I run the rest of the way there. I am closing ground as quick as I can to get to my room. 

I forgot to consider speed more than stealth, and i haven't learned where all the loose planks are. There is a loud creek, and Satan chasizes me loudly from the other side of the door. "KEEP QUIET! I am trying to read!"

...I guess I am inconvenient to everyone. My voice crackles weakly. "I'm... sorry."

I hear clattering and tromping I normally associate with cats dashing around at 2 am, and then fiddling with the door knob on the other side. "Miracle, wait." He opens the door. "If I'd known it was you, I wouldn't have tried to be so intimidating. Though, after your display I didn't think anything could intimidate you." He smiles and chuckles, but it seems warm and friendly.

I chuckle back, but my smile is weak. "Plenty intimidates me. Sometimes you gotta fight through it though."

Satan looks at me with an indecipherable smile. "I am at an interesting point in this book, but I think I would absolutely love to continue this conversation with you at a later point." He closes his door and I am just... left picking up the pieces of this broken conversation.

I look at my DDD the time got away from me. I need to meet with Levi so we can get this plan. I can get this accomplished tonight, and maybe I won't have either of these guys talking my ears off about how annoying it is to interact with me... EVER... AGAIN!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mean Girl Asmo that looks at MC as both Aaron and Caddy is difficult.


	8. The Card That Is So High and Wild

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 0

I head to my room to put away my new purchases. I contemplate the interactions of the day. I'm going to have to live with these quirky ass demons for a year. I may need a special bottle of mace for Asmodeus. I shudder, as my mind attempts to process the sense of weakness. I hate feeling weak! It's fucking gross. I decide to bury these cat shit feelings under any other thought that is closer to resembling sand. On that note, I mutter to myself "frozen... assets..." Normally that just makes sense, you can freeze assets by calling the bank and saying a card is stolen. However, when Lucifer mentioned it, there was a sense of irony in his voice. Even if I didn't have a connection I would know that he...didn't involve the bank. ' _Right_.' Yee...I hope he doesn't make that a frequent fixture in my life. I see a flash of the kitchen. Then I suddenly remember the prank we played on Cadet Kyle (as we called him). I get a strong sense of Lucifer laughing in the back of my mind. Does this guy have a sense of humor? He seems stuffy, but at this moment the sound is melodious.

I look down at my DDD, and it is about time to make contact with Leviathan. Seriously, what is that guy's deal? I title this chat.

 **Subj: Operation: Golden Raven**  
Me: I had a conversation with Lucifer, and for reasons I can't fully disclose or comprehend, I think we should check the freezer.  
Leviathan: That sounds DUMB!!!  
Me: Alright Shadow Lord, you got anything better?  
Leviathan: It's LORD OF SHADOW!!!  
Me: I know, anyway, hear me out! Freezer. Tonight 11-ish. If I am wrong, you can totally come up with our next plan 💕 I will anxiously await it 😈

I put away my new purchases and thumb through the history book for what feels like a short time, but I hear a clattering on the other side of the wall. I look at my DDD, it is 10:45. I say a prayer to thank the Lord for Beelzebub and his appetite. I furrow my brow. That was weird.

Beelzebub smiles as I walk in. "Are you hungry too?" He rushes to the fridge and pulls out eggs and looks at me with hope in his eyes. "Normally, I don't share food, but you make good food. So, if you wanna cook something..."

"Beelzebub, it is late, we have school tomorrow. The first day, no less. You should go to sleep."

"I can't! I am too hungry." He eyes the eggs and looks at me pleading.

"Beelzebub, I can't be making meals at this hour. Tomorrow, after class... I'll make you a nice big snack." I sigh.

At first he looks dejected, but he nods. "Okay."

I feel... guilt...pity? I don't know. I just need him to stop looking at me like that, and I need him to leave the kitchen. "There are some shadow chocolates in the hollow of my tree, if you are interested in such things." He smiles at me as he is leaving. "I don't have such things on the regular, but I will share with you when I do. Okay?" Nothing in my life trained me for the day I would be in The Devildom, manipulating _DEMONS_ , but adapt and overcome... I guess.

Leviathan, He Who Can't Be Seen With Me, slinks into the kitchen through the other door as Beelzebub leaves. I turn my attention to him. "I've been waiting over here for five minutes! You couldn't get him out of the kitchen faster?"

I shrug. "Again, if you have ideas that are better than mine, feel free to act on them. Since I am the one doing the heavy lifting, you don't get to critique my form."

His eyes go wide as he looks at me. "You have a lot of nerve talking to me like that. I am...a very p-powerful demon y-ya know! You don't even wield magic!"

"Well, once I am done figuring out how the fuck to get you your money back, you won't have to worry about that. I don't intend to talk to you any more than necessary." I take a deep breaths while he stands there silently. I guess I left him speechless. "So... freezer, yeah?" I walk over and open it. I start to rummage. It doesn't take long to realize that ancient beings accumulate ancient food in the back of the freezer. The expiry dates start to get a bit absurd as I dig towards the back... did they even... have freezers in... the Dark Ages? At this point, I am not sure if I don't want to donate some of this food to a museum. I mutter out loud to myself. "Does Beelzebub not search through here ever?"

"He got in trouble for stealing my Ruri-Chan pancakes..." he starts to explain, "...anyway, it's not your concern, normie human." He says that like it's the best insult he could think of. 

I chuckle. "Well, at least you demons make me feel better about my messy freezer." Eventually something black and shiny with gold writing catches my eye. Is it...? "...huh. Ya know Leviathan, you really shouldn't doubt me." I point to the item at the back of the fridge. "If you contributed anything at all, I would say we make a good team."

"It's actually there?" Leviathan is incredulous as he crowds me to peer over my shoulder. He brushes his hair aside to see.

I turn around to gloat again, but he is inches from me. He starts blushing and stammering as he puts his wrist against his face. All I can make out is "normie tactics."

"Stop being so fuckin' weird dude! Just back up for like two seconds. I'll let you pull the card out. We can get you your shit, and you can stop attackuing me."

He starts berating me again, but doesn't fucking move."Nnn... Otakus are just trying to just enjoy their interests and stuff...and NORMIES..."

"Are trying to get you to complete your fucking part of the plan so we don't have to spend the rest of the fucking night hearing your fucking opinions! I am fucking tired. I don't fucking need this." I scowl at him and he moves back. He has the audacity to look at me like I hurt him! "If you could just lay off for like five fucking minutes, we could get this mother fucking credit card out of the mother fucking freezer and get your shit. Then you can fuck off and never have to deal with my trash normie ass again!" I move out from between him and the fridge. He looks down, seemingly cowed by my good sense and rage. I tremble with its power.

"Can you two stop bein' loud? Some of us are tryin' to sleep!" Mammon grumbles in the archway, rubbing his face. He is wearing nothing but golden silk boxers.

Does anyone really sleep like that? I scowl directly into his eyes, not up or down. "No, you don't get to yell at me. If you would just pay your brother back, I wouldn't have had to deal with this! You wouldn't have to deal with this! We would all be fucking sleeping!" My annoyance try to ground myself as I need to be my best right now. I close my eyes and concentrate on my breathing, but other thoughts bust in. An image of the night sky and the Northern Lights comes to me. The sky sparkles in a jubilant celebration, yet I am anxious. Again, in my anxiety a voice also comes to me. _'When are you going to come find me? I need you to save me. Please.'_ Violet eyes watch me. That was--surprisingly--not calming.

I open my eyes and the room is spinning. I brace myself against the counter with one arm, and hold my thumb and forefinger to my head. Mammon speaks to me with genuine concern. "Mira, are you alright?"

"I..." I look at him. For a moment, I wonder if I could trust him. I really fucking need a shoulder to cry on, probably for the first time in at least a decade. My anger at him is still holding, but... "I...umm..."

Levi pulls me out of this trance. "Huh, cleaning out the freezer is surprisingly profitable!" Mammon's eyes perk up as he looks over. Levi smirks. "I can probably just buy all of my anime's on this!"

Mammon gasps. "Goldie! How I have missed ya! Come back, baby!" He reaches for the card.

"Wait, what? You named your credit card?" I cringe.

Levi looks over at me with disgust in his eyes. "You don't even want to know."

Mammon retorts, "Hey, at least I don't have an obsession with every cartoon woman I see!"

Levi gives a half smile. "I wouldn't insult me too much right now if I were you." He holds up the frozen card. "I wonder if I can defrost this in the microwave." He walks across the kitchen and opens the microwave.

I look up. "Levi, that's a fucking stupid idea."

He scowls at me. "You told me to come up with an idea... so I did!" He then puts the card in. "Hmm... probably defrost cycle. We don't want to melt it, after all."

Mammon runs over and gets on his knees in front of Levi. "Levi, please, no! Take it out of the microwave! I'll do anything you want! Anything!"

Levi looks at him disgusted. "Gross, first stand up and stop groveling. I want you to give me the Seraphina figurine, and make a pact with this human so she can order you to pay me back!"

Mammon looks to me. "You...were in on this? How could ya?"

I scowl at Mammon. "I was in on getting you to pay him back. If you pay him back, he will fuck off of his own accord. I don't want a pact with you. I want you to give him the fucking doll and pay him back. Take your card, and fuck off."

Mammon looks at me shocked and hurt. He then looks down. "N-no, I don't accept these terms."

"What do ya mean, 'terms'?" I snap back. "Leviathan, please stop the microwave."

Leviathan chortles. "LOL asdfghjkl! That is a pact! No wonder humans end up tricked by demons! You don't know what you're doing! HA HA HA HA!"

Mammon speaks. "Levi, stop!" He looks at me. "So, you are offerin' me an object I want... for somethin' I gotta do. That's a pact, dummy..." he looks down, "...and ya can't make me accept these terms."

"Okay, if this has to be a pact, why don't you accept these terms? You don't want to babysit, and I can take care of myself. So..." I cross my arms and scowl at him. 

He looks me in the eyes. "Look, ya ain't gonna get hurt stickin' up for me, then call me beautiful, and then make me go away. I ain't gonna let ya do that."

"Mammon... I..." I sigh with exasperation, as I look at him. I lose my train of thought as I blush... I guess he saw that. He smiles at me. "I... don't feel like this is a conversation like this. Please go put on some sort of shirt. Can you grab the Seraphina figurine while you are at it?" He leaves the kitchen.

Levi sighs at me. "You're lucky he put on boxers. When I went to get the figurine...it's not a doll... ya know? But anyway, I was really mad... because it was among a pile of used tissues on the floor! Can you imagine? So I went over to his bed, lifted my leg, and I was going to kick him! He was up, and caught my leg lightning fast! Like Lucifer and Beel are that fast! He then picked me up upside down and slammed my head into the floor. The WORST part was... he was NAKED! So... at least he put on boxers for you."

I stare into his eyes for five solid seconds while I try to get that whole scene out of my mind, of course without grounding and clearing my mind. I don't want all of that weird shit. "Leviathan, take his card to your room, and I will text you when I've ordered him to pay you back. Then you never have to speak to me again!"

He looks down. "This... p-plan worked w-well then. Huh?"

I sigh. "Yes, and the microwave gave him a sense of urgency. It was a good call." His face looks joyful, and he looks like he is about to lift his hand up...

At that moment, Mammon walks in. He pushes the figurine into Levi's awkwardly half raised hand. "I'm gonna talk to Mira now. So you can uh... fuck off." It seems I am rubbing off on them! 

He takes the package out of the bag, and the biggest smile forms on his face. "OMG Mammon! You didn't ruin it!!!" He looks at me. "Don't forget to make the pact, okay?"

Mammon turns to me. "Alright, so... umm... tell me what ya want from me." He smiles and looks me directly in the eyes.

"Ya know, Mammon... I... this whole thing is so strange to me.. Do you... really want this because we really can just..." I stammer.

He closes the space between us and rests his hand on my cheek and smiles at me. "Mira, there's gotta be somethin' ya want from me."

I look into his eyes as I lean into his hand. I angle my head, just a little upwards to look into his. "Mammon, I stated what I wanted earlier. You don't want that. You've managed to convince me that...maybe I don't want that." I rest my hand against his hand. "So, really, what I want from you depends on what you want from me."

Mammon moves my face so I am looking directly in his eyes. "I ain't gonna spell it out for ya, human." His head lowers to rest on my shoulder, and he inhales deeply.

I run my fingers through his hair. "Mammon, I don't think you know what you want," I challenge, "I think you are used to humans who have like... summoned you for a purpose. I'm just... okay, you know what? You're makin' me care about you and stuff. If that's what you want, the conditions of this pact will reflect that." I gently pull him by his hair to look into my eyes. He bites his lower lip and lets out a trembly exhale. "No matter what happens, you will be able to pay down your debts. I'm talking worst case scenario. You can't have a two century old debt and blame your inability to pay on a few hours babysitting a human, even if it is beneath you."

His eyes move down to look at the ground with a look of dejection. "You weren't supposed to be payin' attention when I said that," he blushes, "no one pays attention to me when I talk. Okay, so, I'll promise to only say nice things about you."

"Mammon, no. I don't need or want that." I move my hand to touch his face. "Mammon, if you have a problem with me, I want you to talk about it with me. You can't do that if you only can say nice things about me. So, how about, you can say things to other people about me... if you wouldn't mind me overhearing them."

"You're a strange human, but alright, I can accept this term." He rests his hands on my hips.

I pull back a little bit and extend my right hand to shake his hand. "So, I guess it's a pact then?"

"Dummy, do ya really wanna seal this with a handshake?!" He moves his lips close to mine, looking deeply into my eyes. "I never sealed a pact with a kiss before...ya know? I hear it gives ya more power over me... gives me more power to help ya." He brushes his fingers up my side, and up to my head. He gently runs his fingers through my hair and his palm on my cheek. "Mira, you're pretty scrappy, but ain't got the power to back up your bravery..."

I lean in and press my lips to his. I take his face in my hands and lose myself to the kiss. I feel tears stream down my face. I feel myself tremble. He wraps his arms around me. I feel safer here than I have felt in a very long time. "Mammon, I am actually terrified... ya know? I thought I made my last stand so many times. I maybe acting tough, but..." Why am I saying this to him? Why can't I stop crying? I, thankfully, lose my train of thought as he kisses me again. He then wraps one arm around my shoulders, and for some unknown reason leans down. Suddenly I am off the ground in his arms. "Mammon, what are you doing?" I look up... into his chiseled jawline and defined cheekbones... I guess. He really is a work of art.

He looks down into my eyes. The blue and gold of his so entracing. "Mira, it's late for you, and you need to go to bed now...so I gotta take you there."

"What? I can walk, ya know?" I protest.

"Human vision isn't as good as a demon's. I wouldn't want you to stub your toe or something!" He speaks with a finality that doesn't allow for protest. Given that my room is right by the kitchen, I don't think I am convincing him to put me down before we get there. What have I actually gotten into here? He really is a piece of work.

I was hoping he would put me down on my bed and leave, but he, instead, sits me down on a chair and starts rummaging through my armoire. "Mammon... what are you doing?"

"I gotta find you pajamas so you can change, don't I?" He speaks like what he is saying is obvious, and I am really asking a lot by making him explain it.

Seriously, what have I gotten myself into? I don't need to be babied like this, and he doesn't seem like he is going to listen, unless I am loud and direct. "MAMMON... STOP!" He freezes, glued to the spot. It's like he seized up. It's terrifying. I run over to check on him. "Mammon?! Are you okay?"

He moves his eyes to look at mine. "Ya commanded me to stop... so I stopped, dummy."

I put my thumb and index finger to the center of my forehead. I have a low-grade migraine. "Mammon, you can go to bed now... I think I got it from here."

I chose some PJs, and head to the bathroom so I can shower. It's been a weird fucking night, and running water is far better than meditation for quieting my mind. I prep for bed with no further incident... until I come back out. Mammon is on my bed. I rethink my wording. 'You can go to bed'... I guess I didn't specify which bed, so if you want to be an obstinate fuck... I take one of my pillows and plop down on the couch.


	9. Once For The Devil, and Once for Christ

I am restless and can't sleep. I hear the voice again, calling to me. "You said you'd try to save me, but you haven't even found me yet. Have you forgotten about me? Aren't you even the slightest bit curious?" I can hear the smirk attempting to cover up the sadness in his voice. I get up and walk towards him. It feels nearly like I am floating. I know where to go, despite the fact I have not been there. quicker than I should, I find myself in front of a room in a tower. The doors are covered over with bars. He comes out from the shadows. His eyes are a dark blueish purple which blend into a pink. His face is narrow, and he has dark hair that fades to white at the tips. He gives me a sleepy smile, and something about it seems familiar. "Finally! You made it! Let me see the face of my knight in shining armor..."

I feel an ache in the center of my forehead as those words echo through me. The tower room is gone... or I am gone... I cannot tell. I am peering through a fog. It is dark, and the scents of forest, blood, death and fire assail my nostrils. As I gain my bearings, and take a couple of steps, I hear the clink and feel the weight of my chainmail suit. I grasp at a bastard sword in my right hand and a kite shield in my left. I am here to fight a holy war, but I have been doubting the veracity of my own beliefs.

My regiment entered this Hell through a portal about three fortnights ago. This portal--as reported by my cardinal-- is one that foul demons oft come through to tempt the humans that are more easily bound by their evil proclivities, and we must give a show of force to scare them away. Though, since I received The Holy Light, I have noticed things were off here or there with my information and this is no exception. Often, these are things I would always notice, but as a matter of faith I wouldn't question my holy authorities. One such item of note has been plaguing my mind since we arrived at this portal. The area surrounding the portal seemed more like an overgrown forest than a well worn demonic thoroughfare. I suggested setting up sentries on our side of the portal to see what comes out, but I was informed, that the men have a thirst for Glory in the name of The Lord. Though they have been talking of nothing but demon blood for the entirety of the trek up here. It discomforts me but I keep quiet. I do what I must to protect my countrymen from these evils.

My thoughts were meandering, but are pulled back when I hear raucous laughter from the campsite. Laughter is normally not a oft worrisome sign. People laugh in battle when morale is high. We play lighthearted pranks on each other and we laugh about it. However, there was something cruel to this laughter that caused me much concern. I make my way back to the fire. The way the light casts on my men makes their faces look like twisted horrid visages. The very ones you would expect to see in a Hellscape. They close ranks around a sleeping demon. Their eyes carry an eagerness for malevolence which I have not seen before. I look again at the demon.

That demon... the one who was talking to me from the room in the tower. I see the room, and I see him. He is looking at me like he is expecting something, though I have no clue what. His eyes carry that same look, but I would be surprised if they didn't. I jolt back to his sleeping face. This demon is heavily sedated. He appears to be sleeping peacefully. One must be thoroughly drugged to do that here. I take a swig of sweet mead to the irony of the innocence he portrays and the danger I know he is in. He looks nearly angelic. The Holy Light within me mourns, but I must laugh. Somberness does not serve a leader in the face of victory, and this is a great victory! We captured one of these black-hearted foes. He moves to place his index finger upon his lip, very much like a child. I try to keep a look of unadulterated glee on my face through this feeling of utter horror. Would my mood be so dire if I had not this light within me? No time to contemplate that maybe, as one of my drunkard men claps my shoulder. "Good even', Sir Peter! We found a horrifying enemy in the woods. He was rather easy for us to subdue. The poison The Cardinal gave us was extremely effective at inducing slumber. Do not worry, Sir Peter! He will not have too long to savor these dreams. He will awaken into a nightmare of our making." They laugh wickedly again.

I smile in response, "I congradulate you on this stunning blow, and your huge role in our victory tomorrow!" I otherwise hold my silence as they cheer my words. I shant risk speaking any of my coursing and coalescing thoughts. I maybe in charge, but I doubt my ability to hold their loyalty if I speak the blasphemy in my soul.

I retire early for sleeping is more beneficial than speaking. I must rest to have strength in battle, but I am troubled. Several hours pass as I think and then contemplate my thoughts. I am leading a holy crusade against evil, or are we the evil? It becomes so very blurred. I cannot stop thinking of that demon and my men surrounding him. Would they hurt him? I grit my teeth. **HE IS PURELY EVIL!!!** I can scream it at myself loudly in my head, though I know that my conviction falters. I wish to quell these thoughts. I wish to quell any of them. I wish to act decisively, but that will not happen. I bite my hand to keep myself from crying out. I truly wish for nothing but to stop this gnawing feeling. The Holy Light burns as a testament. I wish it was even a dilemma, but I know I am going to give up my compatriots, my command, and my country. I am going to give it all up to save this demon from the dirty clutches of humanity. I tense up and make soundless cries. I know I must do, and I hate it...

~~~~

Suddenly, the nature of my world changes. I feel surrounded by warmth. I close my eyes, and open them again. I am in clouds. I am in an office. Rather, office furniture is arranged on a cloud. It was already a long day by noon. I made myself stop to get lunch. Since my promotion, my brothers and sisters don't really talk to me. They stop conversations or quiet them to whispers when I am around. They are polite if I say hi, but due to my strong love and respect of them, I generally limit my contact. Today, I was tasked to talk to one of my brothers who was behaving in a wrong fashion. Mammon is his name. I try not to dawdle as I look for him.

I scan the crowd until I see him. He's got the biggest grin on his face as he laughs. Most of my brothers and sisters don't look like they are scheming, but you could always see in his eyes that he is plotting a prank. Even now, when he tells stories. Judging by the way the others are captivated and smiling, I would guess the stories are interesting. For one moment, I imagine myself allowed to simply listen and be regaled by his entertaining tales. That is not my lot anymore though. If I am not working, my work does not get done. If I stop to listen, everyone respectfully pauses anyway. It has been sheer torture.

It's a shame I have to interrupt. I wish I could simply leave and leave them to their joy. I walk up, and the others hush their laughter. Luckily, he doesn't notice me at first, and he continues his story. "...so that's when I told him, 'look Michael, the humans need to be a little confused, and the platypus is a way better idea than the tarantula! It will keep their future scientists guessin' for a while!'" So he is the one who came up with the platypus! I chuckle thinking about it. Mammon looks at me terrified. My heart drops. "Muriel! I didn't know you were standin' there!" He stammers and blushes.

My heart drops. I wish I could say he has nothing to fear from me, but that would be an uncomfortable lie right now. I look him in the eyes and the realization that I am engaging in a difficult conversation hits me hard. I feel the heat rising to my face, and find myself utterly flustered. "Mammon, I um... I need to talk to you." I'm not commanding the power I would like for this situation.

He blushes harder. "Umm... now? I mean...it's okay if you wanna talk now. Do umm... ya wanna have lunch with me?"

I chuckle and look down at my feet. In truth, I would like to have lunch with him. I would like to have lunch with anyone. "Oh, no. I wouldn't want to subject you to that. It's probably best to talk at the end of the day."

He looks away. "I mean... it would be my pleasure to have lunch with ya... umm... ya know?"

I chuckle as I turn away. I musn't show my pain. No one needs to see it. "Thank you for saying that. You are very kind. The end of the day will be fine." I walk away. I shake my head. I used to be so much better at conversation.

He calls to me. "I'll... um... be looking forward to it."

Surely he is mocking me, but I can't do anything but sigh. A smile creeps across my face as I contemplate the time I took his favorite shiny rock a few days before his birthday. He was looking for it, but wouldn't tell anyone. I set the stone in a platinum ring. I then gave that to him as my gift to him. That was a fun prank, and the joy in his eyes when he saw the ring and placed it on his finger. It still makes me chuckle. I hold that memory dear as I look around to make sure no one sees me before wrapping my arms around myself. I allow myself a small giggle.


	10. Everything That I Keep Locked Away In My Head

I remember my dreams as my mind founders from sleep to the discordant cawing of my alarm.*BEEP BEEP BEEP* That noise grates against one ear, as the sound of... breathing and stirring echoes in my other. I open my eyes. I slept well, albeit not as long as I would have liked. I feel arms wrapped around me. As I try and get up, I hear a whimper, and he holds me tighter. I look up and see the underside of Mammon's chin. "How did I get here?" I softly mumble. I feel like I should be more concerned, as this is the first time I have slept... like this, but the peace I feel here is...otherworldly? "Mammon, how did I get here?"

He grunts, as he fights the necessity to wake up, and sleepily mumbles. "That's The Great Mammon! Don'cha forget!"

Uh... that's not really an answer to my question? I sigh. My parents had warned me that my lifestyle of sin and partying will lead to me waking up with a man and no idea how I got there. I chuckle at the unbidden thought of them. "Alright, fine The Great Mammon, umm... First of His Name, His Mammon-ness, High King of Fillory... is that enough titles for you? Anyway, how did I get here?"

He opens his eyes and looks at me with a scowl, but he is gently stroking my shoulder with his thumb. "After everything ya put me through last night, yer gonna make fun of me too? Ya kept screamin about betrayal and how vile men are. Ya know, ya could just give me yer ex boyfriend's name, and I can steal his wallet right?" He smiles at me.

Why would I be screaming all of that... oh... yeah. Given that I don't have even fully have a supposition, let alone an idea of what all of that is about, better to let him assume my concerns are related to a normal human experience. I smile. "I'll... keep that in mind, thank you Great Mammon. Anyway, how did I get here?"

He blushes. "Well umm... you were screamin' and stuff...like I said...and I tried to wake ya, so I touched your shoulder. Then ya got all calm, so I figured ya were fine, right? But then when I walked away to go back to sleep ya started screamin' about these stupid men again. I wasn't gonna get to sleep with ya doin' that... ya know? Anyway, I picked ya up, put ya on the bed, and when I laid down, ya just... kinda held me." His face was burgundy and he could not meet my eyes by the end of him relating his tale.

I should be alarmed. I am apparently screaming in my sleep, and I have a demon picking me up and bringing me to bed with him. I even have a demon sleeping in my room, which precipitated this. Actually, come to think of it, I made a pact with a demon. All of this, and I don't even feel uneasy, and THAT makes me feel uneasy. Three days in hell, and my highly functional moral compass seems to have shattered from the stress. I don't have time to worry about that. I know that when under this stress, keeping to schedules is important. "Mammon, we need to get ready for class." I take his hand that is resting on my shoulder, and I bring it to my lips to kiss it before removing it. So much is flooding through me. I look into his eyes. Is he feeling all of this, too? I feel my cheeks flush. It feels like... it isn't right... that I pull away from him. The weight and significance of this place comes back to me as I move to sit up. I subconsciously touch his shoulder. "I am one of two emissaries of all of humanity here, and I feel like I am in shambles." The weight of my own words hits me. "Holy fuck! I am an emissary of all of humanity, and my first day is going to be after half a night of sleep, and half of that a nightmare."

I sigh as I get up and go to the closet. I fumble for one of the sets of uniforms I assembled on the hanger. I can feel Mammon looking at me, and I hope I am not acting too strange. "Miracle," I look over at him and blush. He is blushing as well. He pulls an overnight bag from under my bed. How and when it got there, I don't know. He then pulls a wrinkly uniform out from it. "I umm... noticed that your bed is more comfortable than mine, but ya made it really hard to sleep with your screamin'... Ya know... no one can sleep with all that! So...um ya know...since ya calm down when I'm holdin' ya... ya might as well just... ya know sleep with me... since I'm sleepin' in here anyway. That way, we will both sleep better... ya know?"

How is this conversation not pissing me the fuck off? I go to an out of view area of my room to change while I sit with my confusion. There is a long pause. As much as the words of this powerful an ancient being seem to be a decree, his eyes seem to be asking for...permission? "Mammon, I dated a guy for two years and wouldn't be alone with him in my bedroom with the door closed. It's weird enough for me that I ended up with you in my room last night, but now you are just...taking up residence? I mean, I trust you with my life, and consider you very close--especially since I didn't even know you last week. We have been through a lot together in two fucking days. We even kissed. It's been a whirlwind... truly, but like...I feel like I should be indignant right now. You decided last night that you were sleepin' here. You didn't even ask. That should be annoying me. I mean, holy fuck! However, I pride myself on the fact I go with my intuition." He looks down, dejected. "The thing that is strange, is... somehow I'm just okay with you, if I'm being honest. Two fucking days, and I just... entirely trust you, and am happy to have you around. So... this sounds good, I guess." 

He looks at me, and a smile plays across his face. "Really? I mean... of course ya want me around! I'm The Great Mammon."

He mumbles some other things about how awesome he is as I get ready. He seems genuinely happy, and that makes me smile. I am not sure if Mammon has managed to be so annoying it's somehow endearing, or if the fact that he treats me with a kindness and gentleness has weighed very heavily into my opinion of him, or if butting heads with Lucifer has a lobotomizing effect. This damned fool is winning me over, and I'm not sure how I feel about it. I pull out a hair donut, two rubber bands, and some gel. I slick and tighten my hair into a bun until it shines and you could bounce a quarter off of it.

I look myself over in this uniform. It flattens my chest and makes my hips look boxy. NICE! I'm not going to be able to get them tailored until next weekend. I chuckle to myself in the mirror. Mammon comes up behind me, and looks me up and down and whistles. "Wow, that doesn't flatter ya, at all. Don't worry, The Great Mammon is here to help!" He moves lightning fast. Before I can command him to stop, he loosens my tie, undoes the top and second button of my shirt, and unbuttons my coat. He then looks me over as he drapes it on me with some kind of mathematical precision. He then untucks my shirt and smiles as he gives me a once over. He takes my face in his hands and gives me an affectionate kiss as he ruffles my hair under my bun. He steps back and looks me over with a proud smile. "There, now ya look good! Wait... on second thought..." he re-does my second button and gives me a wink. "If we were just hangin out, it'd be different, but umm..." He blushes. 

Not like it matters much, as I am not wearing my uniform either way, but there's no reason to not finish your fucking sentence. "Mammon, we are going to need to discuss personal space at some point." I speak to him with a pure gentleness, far more gentleness than I think I am feeling at the moment. I go back to the mirror and look at his work. I have to admit if my goal was to look like a hot mess, I could apply some lip gloss and be the hottest mess out there, pity. Maybe after I get a feel for things, I'll think about walking around looking like some kind of chaotic rock star I would need a bass guitar. It's not like I know how to play, but no one expects you to whip it out and play something anyway. However all of that is for another time, for now I correct my uniform and hair with military precision. While I am amazed that the simple tussle somehow gave me a perfect messy bun, this is not the look that is required for the task at hand.

I stand up straight, hold my chin up, and ensure my non-verbals convey a confidence I don't feel as I apply a light coat of my rosy lip tint and put in my pearl studded earrings. I take a couple of deep breaths. "The only easy day was yesterday, and soon today will be yesterday." I hit my palm with my fist, and set out of my room. "I'll catch ya downstairs, Mammon."

I walk around looking sure of myself, despite the fact I am hopelessly lost. This house doesn't follow a logic I have seen before. I walk to the end of two corridors, and find a spiral staircase to the attic before I find my way to the dining room. This is amazing, because the dining room isn't far from the kitchen... and I know where that is. I stroll in, and scan around looking for a non-threatening way to assert dominance. Satan, Beelzebub, Leviathan, and Asmodeus are gathered joking and laughing. They all look up and smile as I enter. Asmodeus tries to make eye contact with me; I give him the cold shoulder that he rightfully deserves. It looks like psychological warfare is on the breakfast menu, but I was really hoping for pancakes. Satan smiles at me. It is unsettling how his face can go from a thoughtful look to a wide, exuberant smile so quickly. I try to go towards him. If I engage him in conversation, maybe I can avoid Asmodeus entirely for the rest of the morning, and maybe the whole fucking day. If I am lucky he will fuck off for the entire fucking year.

Alas, it wasn't meant to be. Asmodeus corners me, forcing me into conversation. "So I heard you tricked Mammon into a pact last night!"  
I feel a burning rage at his presence even when he is being rather innocuous. I feel myself shake, but my strong façade holds. "Umm..."  
"That was pretty impressive." He smiles, and tries to meet my eyes, I stare over his shoulder meeting eyes with Satan.  
"Thanks." I say flatly.  
He smiles but it looks more like he is bearing his teeth. That fucker makes my skin crawl. "So you agree with me? You're impressive?" He chuckles as he brushes his index finger across my cheek.  
His closeness and familiarity make me uncomfortable. I snarl at him, as I feel lights brighten. I slap his hand away. "Don't fucking touch me!" The noise that issues from me does not sound like it is actually in my register. It sounds nearly feral. I notice Satan and Beelzebub coming towards us, as Leviathan leaves the room, muttering something disparaging, I'm certain. I'm also certain they are coming to attack me. I contemplate all avenues of escape, as I wouldn't bet on me against any of these men really, but three of them at once? All of my most likely plans to get to safety seem to lead to Mammon. I am amazed at how implicitly I trust him.  
Asmodeus smirks. "You have no pact with me. Your commands have no sway over me. It's really a pity Lucifer won't let me hurt you. I could make your death agonizing exquisite torture." He licks his lips. "I could rip you apart piece by piece, as you beg for it. Is it more torture, or the release of death you beg for? You wouldn't even know by the end. You would climax more forcefully than a human has power to as I ripped out your heart."

I have trouble holding back my tears, let alone the trembling from my desire to flee. I can't stop myself from screaming out. "Don't fucking talk to me!" I pant from the force of this scream.

Satan looks at me. Is that concern in his eyes, he must be confident they can take me on. Why is he concerned? I feel amped up. I am concerned. If I make one mistake... I am dead. I know it. I must make no mistakes...

somehow, Lucifer entered the room. Shit, I must have missed that when concentrating on my other enemies. I cannot surrender, death is the only option. His voice speaks to me through this. He speaks with a confident and soothing quality. "Asmodeus, I would be careful. She was rather formidable with nothing in her arsenal but her surprisingly hard head, and now she has utensils." He is generally very subtle, and in contrast with that, he gives a very exaggerated look to my right hand. I look down, and see in the process of this unpleasantness, I somehow grabbed ahold of a butter knife, and pointed it at Asmodeus as if it would do anything but annoy him. My knuckles are white; my arm shakes with the force of my grasp. Even I am shocked by my desire for violence. I let go, and it feels like minutes before I hear the knife clatter on the floor.

Lucifer winces and holds his head. I look to him. "Lucifer, I apologize for this... for my part..."

He holds his other hand up to cut me off. "Mira, if I didn't have to break up a fight during breakfast at The House of Lamentation, it would be because I was needed somewhere else." While I could tell he held nothing against me for this, his voice was tinged with exhaustion. It felt like, for the first time, I got a glimpse of the 'burden of power' as it was. I wanted to comfort him. I wanted to tell him 'I am here for you, if you need me.' but it was a strange urge. It's utter arrogance to think he would even want empathy from a frail being such as myself, as I stand there shaking from my frazzled nerves. Sure, I am clearly in a position to offer a shoulder to cry on.

It feels like I am in a trance, watching Lucifer, trying to figure out what I want to convey to him. Looking at him makes me cry. I don't even know why. Tears come streaming down my face, when suddenly, I am caught up in an embrace, as a familiar voice cries out. "What are ya assholes doin' to my human? Ya ain't supposed to make her cry!" Mammon grabs a napkin and starts dabbing at my tears. "Did ya all at least let her get breakfast, first?" 

Beelzebub looks away guiltily. "I didn't think anyone was going to want to eat after the fight, so I didn't want to let the food go to waste. I'm sorry."

Satan lets out an indignant sigh, generally, at everything. "I guess now that Mira's champion is here, she'll be safe. Unfortunately, the whole room just got dumber for it." He gathers his books and leaves.

Mammon looks between Asmodeus and Lucifer. "Well, what did ya do to my human." I really don't know why Mammon thinks I am incapable of giving a rendering of events, or what exactly he means when he says 'my human' like that.

Lucifer scowls at Mammon. "It's rather bold of you to talk to me like that, don't you think?" I was just starting to feel empathy for Lucifer... but if he comes at MY DUMB DEMON (wait, what do I mean by that?) again... Lucifer looks at me with a smirk... "But don't worry, I would never harm _your master._ " Mammon looks away blushing at that. Lucifer looks over at me with a smile. "By the way, congratulations on getting a pact before your first day of school." He looks at Asmodeus. "It's rather impressive. I think I shall tell Diavolo of this." His smile is warm. I guess he doesn't need my comfort, but... fuck, are we friends now?

Asmodeus won't break his scowl with me. I can feel it, even though I refuse to keep him anywhere but my peripheries. Mammon looks over at Asmodeus. "Ya know... I wasn't here, so I don't know what ya did. But, since ya made it so my human couldn't get breakfast... I'm gonna need your wallet, so I can make sure that we... I mean she... has everything she wishes for today."

Asmodeus can't scowl at both of us at once. I am sure he wishes he could. "Ugh... Mammon, you are so transparent. Why are you such scum?"

I grit my teeth. "Don't talk to him like that..."

Lucifer puts a hand firmly on my shoulder, and strokes soothingly. "Honestly, Asmodeus, it is a transparent, but fair request." I look at him. He seems to relish this, but if it does something to stave the flow of pure malevolence from the Avatar of Lust, fine. "Give Mammon your wallet. Perhaps it will teach you to moderate yourself and stop saying vile and disgusting things. I know you were angered by her treatment of me on our first meeting, but she and I are able to hold a civil conversation now. It's time for you, perhaps, to learn." As I calm down, he loosens his grip on me. "I will also give you a disclosure, Asmodeus." Asmodeus's rosy eyes look to Lucifer. "Both of you actually." Mammon looks up. "Mira broadcasts her thoughts to me. She has some methods to stop it from happening, but they get less effective when her emotions flair up. Use that information how you will." That causes me to blush.

I go over to gather my books, but Mammon gets there first though. Maybe if I let him take my books, he won't try and carry me to class.

Beelzebub comes up holding his stomach. "So, since you guys are going to the café, can I come with you? So it doesn't look weird when I get more food..."

Mammon looks over at his brother. "Beel, ya get food no matter what. I'm sure people expect it by now. Come on Mira, let's go." He holds his hand out to me.

Beel frowns and looks down like a kicked puppy. Twice, I was certain he was going to destroy me in some fit of rage, but any time I've talked to him he seems truly sweet... after he's been fed. "Mammon, Beelzebub is coming with us. Ya don't need to treat your brother like that." 

Mammon looks a little sad. "Fine," Mammon sighs, "but hold my hand so I can keep ya safe, okay?" I take his hand caress it with my thumb, causing him to blush.

Beel looks at me and smiles so sweetly. "I know I eat too much, but it's nice to have company... sometimes."


End file.
